January 10

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I just woke up a little bit ago and thought I would fill you in on what happened yesterday, Scott. After school, I didn't have a ride home. My parents were too disgusted and pissed at me to give me a ride. I'm starting to think they don't want me anymore. Like if I were to disappear, they wouldn't even notice. I clutched my journal tight to my chest, walking around, my thoughts clouding my head. I didn't know how I could get home. Megan was on the bus. I walked. I needed to talk to Megan though. I knew she said something to you and not knowing what it was was driving me mad. Knocking on her front door when I got there, I glanced at my house and sighed. I asked myself if I should even go back. Megan opened the door and her face lit up.

"Mitch? What are you doing here?" Her confusion was obvious, but I didn't pay any attention to it.

"We need to talk," I grabbed her hand and guided her into her house, up the stairs, and into her bedroom. There was silence.

"What did you say to Scott about me?" I asked her and I saw relief wash over her face as she sat down on her chair and spun around a few times.

"That's what this is about?" She said, "Mitch I thought something was wrong oh my gosh," she rubbed her temples and then spoke quietly. "Listen, nothing too bad and nothing too obvious that you have certain feelings for him, okay? I simply said that you felt really bad about pouring coffee all over him at Starbucks."

"What did he say?"

"He said it was totally alright and that he basically already forgot about it so you have nothing to worry about."

"And..?" I was getting impatient because I knew she said more to him and that she was stalling. That was her way of doing so.

" And... then I said that you guys should totally get together some time and hang. I told him you would love that!" I feel as if my heart stopped then and there. I didn't know why she would do that!

"Megan! I trusted you with my secret.."

"I know, I just couldn't help it! I want you guys to get together. I hate seeing you like this." I tried to calm my breathing and she came over to give me a reassuring and almost demanding hug. "Don't worry about it. You saw how cool he was about it. He probably doesn't think anything of it. You can stay here and get some rest. I just want to make sure you're okay..."

Right now, I just woke up. I thought I would fill you in on everything since when I got to Megan's house, I didn't have time to write to you. I spent the night here. Nothing too serious, she just wanted to check up on me and keep me company. I don't know how to tell her I am not going home. I can't go home, I refuse to. I am sitting on her bed right now. She's on the floor. Such a good friend that she let me sleep on the bed. I felt like I finally had someone who cares. I am deciding on waking her up or just running away like last night never even happened. But I couldn't leave her like that. I decided on writing her a note.

Hi Megan, I wanted to leave this note for you, so you're not completely unaware and confused to what is going to happen. My parents found out about Scott a few days ago, they found my journal. They hate me. If my own parents hate me because of who I am, then what will the rest of the world think of me? I don't want to stay around to find out. You are the most amazing friend I ever had, you were one of my only friends I ever had. If everyone else moves on and forgets about me, promise me that you'll be that 1% that still holds me in their heart. I'm running away. I have no idea where I am going, I don't really care. I need to get away from here as fast as I can. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for caring, I just wish more people did.

Sincerly, Mitch

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