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days had passed in a blur. ashton spent most of them working or organizing something in her room. she felt horrible about everything but she was also feeling bitter. after all, it wasn't just her fault.

it had been a week since she had talked to jisung. and he hadn't made the effort to either. he was the one who had needed space to begin with. but ashton couldn't help but think, how long did he need? she knew she hurt him but he had hurt her too.

ashton had just gotten off work and she didn't want to go home just yet, not wanting to be trapped by four walls that would only make her overthink again. so she just went on a drive.

the sun was starting to go down and she had her sad playlist blasting through the aux. the windows were down, blowing ashton's freshly dyed blue hair in different directions.

she drove until the sun was completely down. she thought of going to elisia's but she really just wanted to be alone. she was using the time to gather her thoughts and think things through.

she knew what she wanted. even if it would shatter her entirely. she had tried to stray away from the idea but she couldn't. she knew it was the best choice. for both her and jisung.

ashton pulled into her driveway and turned the car off. she sniffled and wiped at her eyes. then she grabbed her phone and unplugged it from the aux.

she went to her phone app and her favorites came onto the screen. she took a deep breath before tapping on the name at the top. jisung.

it rung three times before he answered. "hey."

"hey ji," she said. and then it was silent. she was trying to find the courage to say what she needed to say.

he didn't say anything and ashton thought for a second he hung up. but then he spoke. "sorry i didn't call sooner. i meant to, i really did. but i just didn't know what to say," he said.

"yeah," ashton's voice was soft. and then it was silent again. she sighed. "jisung, i think we should just break up."

"what? why?" he asked. "is it because of me? because i ignored you?"

"it's not just that," ashton replied. "it's just...everything. i'm tired, jisung. of the fighting, the hurting. aren't you?"

"i'm sorry, ashton. i'll do better," jisung said and ashton couldn't stop the fresh tears that streamed down her cheeks.

"i can't do this anymore..."

before she could finish what she was saying, jisung interrupted her. "you can't? or you won't? which is it, ashton? i'm willing to work this out. we can work this out," jisung was practically begging and ashton choked back a sob. but her mind was made up. "ashton, please. don't do this."

"what do you expect me to say, jisung?" ashton asked and jisung could hear the sadness in her tone. "do you just expect me to be okay with how the past few weeks have went? how you just blatantly ignored me and then you slap an apology on it, thinking that's going to make everything okay again? that's not how it works, jisung."

"i know. and i said i'm sorry. but you're so fucking selfish, y'know! you're only thinking about you! and i don't want this! i don't want us to break up!" jisung started raising his voice.

"i'm only thinking about me? are you serious right now?" ashton raised her voice back at him. "you were the one that ignored me for weeks! you let me think things that i didn't want to think or believe! i didn't need that! do you really think this relationship is healthy for either of us? all we do is argue anymore!"

"of course you make this about you! you always do! you never think about the way i'm feeling! it's always you, you, you! what about me? you want to preach about how we're a couple and we need to work things out together! but then you want to break up! you made this choice! not me!"

"yes, i made this choice, jisung! because this shit isn't good for me! and it's not good for you either! you're just too prideful to admit it!" she said. then they both got quiet again. ashton couldn't help but let out a sob and jisung's heart broke a little more. "this is why it won't work out for us, ji."

her tone was calm now. quiet. certain. jisung wiped his tears and swallowed. "okay," he mumbled. "then i guess it's over now."

"it's just for the best," ashton whispered, new tears pooling in her eyes. "i'm so sorry."

"it's okay. i understand. i'm sorry i got upset," he said and she heard him sniffle. "i'll always love you, princess. i hope you know that."

jisung hung up after that and ashton felt her heart shatter into a million pieces. she rested her head on the steering wheel and just sobbed. she stopped long enough to go inside, then she went up to her room and cried herself to sleep.

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