A Summer Musical

🎶 Chapter 11 - Panicking 🎶

Mr. Mazzara's POV

A very fidgety and nervous looking Ricky sat down on the porch steps, looking at me. He clearly had no idea what he was doing or what he needed to do. "What now?"

"Talk." I told him.

"About what?"

"What's going on if you can, anything if you can't."

"I don't know what's going on." He said.

"What does it feel like?"

"Um- uh, like I'm sorta disconnected from the world, and really shaky." He explained. I got off the chair I was sitting in and sat beside him.

This was definitely an experience I hadn't expected, but Jennifer was close with her students. I was bound to end up doing the same. It was probably a good thing she had taught me.

"Okay, so you know why?"

"N- No."

"Okay, but do you know why you started to feel bad?" I asked. "Not why you feel like this specific kind of bad, just why you feel bad?"

"I was, uh, thinking about my parents' relationship, and Nini, and all my friends were busy, so for a minute I was thinking about if they were having trouble with anything, because Big Red was feeling down, and I just started feeling really bad. Nothing bad happened, but I felt bad." He tried to explain.

"Okay. That's a good thing to know." I nodded. "Now do you think you could focus for me?"

"On?"

"What are 5 things you can see?" I asked.

"How is this going to help?" He asked.

"Stop playing with your zipper Ricky."

"Sorry." He let go.

"You've gotta break that pattern and slow down if you ever want to stop shaking." I said. "Along with that, you should tell me the 5 things you see."

"Okay, uh... streetlight."

"Good."

"That lady and her dog." He pointed out them on the sidewalk.

"Continue."

"There's not m... much around."

"Anything from the road to a little bug on the pavement, just point something out." I said.

"Okay, um— there's that empty flower pot."

"Yes."

"And... Miss Jenn's car..." he said. I looked over, realizing she was now here.

"Sh— Shoot." I sighed. "Move on to my things you can hear."

"Birds... cars... the wind in the trees, whatever's in the bushes... that's about it."

"That's good." I nodded. "How do you feel?"

"Much better."

"Okay, so—" I looked over and saw Jennifer heading over. When she reached us I gestured for her to wait a second, more focused on Ricky. "I'm fairly certain that was a panic attack or something along the lines of it."

"Oh."

"I know it's not really a good thing to hear, but it's nice to know why something like that happens. I don't know what you can do, but therapy's always helpful if you can manage to get it."

"Okay." He nodded.

"Call one of your parents." I stood up. He nodded, walking a bit away, and starting talking on the phone.

"Hi..." Jennifer looked confused.

"I was waiting for you—"

"Sorry 'bout that, got caught up." She apologized.

"It's fine. Ricky showed up, and... well you heard what happened, panic attack."

"He's fine now?"

"He's better." I nodded.

"How did you know?"

"I used to have some, I've got them under control, and my dad always had them." I admitted.

"Oh. I'm sorry." She frowned. I cleared my throat, pulling myself together after being unusually sympathetic.

"It's fine now." I smiled slightly. "Anyways, I don't know what to do about Ricky now. His parents aren't home, and after calming down it's kinda easy to spiral again."

"Maybe we should leave it up to him? We could invite him in, but I think considering we're— well, you're— his teacher and we're dating, he might be uncomfortable with that too."

"That's true." I nodded.

"Um, thank you Mr. Mazzara." Ricky came back over. "Big Red said he'd be home soon and his parents are really nice about this kind of thing, so I think I'm gonna head over there."

"Okay." I sent him a smile.

"Bye Miss Jenn." He waved. "Wait, are you two—"

"Yes." I sighed.

"Mkay." He smiled slightly as he started down the sidewalk.

"Oh my God." Jennifer nudged my shoulder. "You're amazing."

"I mean..."

"I love you."

"Er— I love you too." I smiled, watching the smile that grew on her face.

"Now come on in." She invited me inside, opening the front door.