Orangutangents

Spectacles, Testicles, Wallet and Watch

I've worn glasses for well over thirty years now, and it's automatic that the first thing I do in the mornings is reach for my vision.

So, I was a little surprised the other morning when I got to the kitchen to hit the switch on the kettle (coffee first) and couldn't see the kettle. After a moment's panic I realised that I'd not got my specs on.

Now Brian is pretty vague at the best of times, and I suspect I forget various things on a regular basis, but forgetting your glasses?

A friend of mine always pats himself down as he leaves the house with the immortal muttering 'Spectacles, Testicles, Wallet and Watch' to make sure he's got all the pertinent bits of his evening arsenal.

Now, while I'm certain that parts of my anatomy would remain attached and not have to be bolted on before leaving the house, I too have the regular check of 'keys, wallet, phone, hat' (a bald man always carries a hat). But I've never had to remind myself to wear my glasses before. So, I'm guessing the the old grey cells are finally succumbing to years of oddity. 

But I did remember this, which seemed kinda relevant, and reminded me of my gran who was wonderful. Enjoy...

Three Elderly Sisters

Three sisters, 92, 94, and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts one foot in, pauses, then yells down the stairs, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"

The 94-year-old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the stairs, then pauses and yells out, "Was I going up the stairs or down?"

The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having a cup of tea and listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful." She knocks on wood for good measure, finishes her mouthful of tea and shouts "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."