Sarah Paulson Character One-shots

How to save a life - Tammy

A/N: This is my first mental health related one shot, if you have any other related requests just let me know :)

Prompt: Tammy thinks it's time for an intervention after you've been pushing her and the group away for over a month. Based on the song "How to save a life" by The Fray.

TW: cigarettes, self harm, suicide intention (nothing too graphic),

Tammy is standing in your driveway for what seems to be an intervention, but as she is the only one standing there, it seems to be more of a confrontation than anything. She is waiting beside her car for you to come out to have your evening cigarette as you'd usually do, but you're taking far too long.

You try to avoid it as much as possible, but with your anxiety growing and the nicotine withdrawal kicking in, you do come out eventually. Although you're confused as to why she hasn't just walked in as she would usually do, you're thankful anyway as your place is a mess. You step out through the door onto your porch; you make sure to ignore her though, walking to the other side away from her.

"Y/N." she says softly as she closes her eyes before she takes a good look at you. You're a bit thinner than she would prefer, and the lack of life in your features is worrying her. "We need to talk."

You know exactly what's coming so you choose to play along, giving her a polite smile, just praying that she doesn't see straight through you. But of course, she does. This is Tammy, after all. She frowns at you, making you sigh a little but the smile is not leaving your face as you pace around the deck, seeming to mark out a safe space for yourself for the upcoming storm. This only irks the blonde, seeing you so fidgety when she's trying to speak.

"Just stand still for a moment, please." She says, annoyance creeping into her voice as you still continue pacing. You didn't want to look at her properly or talk to her, you felt like you couldn't, not yet, but she was just more concerned than anything, "At least sit down," she says pointing over to the bench that was standing underneath the window to your kitchen "I just want to talk."

You stop in your tracks to only look up and eye the door back into your house momentarily, wanting to leave before it gets too much before the blonde quickly realizes and comes up onto the porch so it feels as if there's no chance to escape.

"Talk to me, please." She begs, pain evident in her voice as she speaks, her lisp only becoming stronger as she becomes more frustrated and worried that you won't talk to her.

The smile returns to your lips as you look at her, your gaze never reaching her eyes though and you tell her what she wants to hear so you can see the fear leave her face, and then she'll just wonder why she came in the first place, "I'm alright," but you're forcing your tears to stay away, a knot forming in your throat making it feel as if it's hard to breathe. You feel awful lying to her. You wish you are strong enough to talk to her. To tell her your problems, but you feel as if you can't. You want to really tell her how you feel and get help, but you feel as if you're at the point of no return already.

The blonde refuses to return the smile, only looking right at you with sad eyes, she can see right through you and you know it. She continues looking at you with a serious look on her face as she moves closer towards the door, as you keep glancing at it, still giving you no chance to escape, showing you how serious she is. You keep the smile plastered on your face, however, and walk over to your left, away from her, to light up your cigarette.

She didn't want to come on too strong, but there's no other way given the circumstance "You've been self harming again haven't you?" her voice broke out as a mere whisper, you look at her face to try to provide anything to prove that allegation wrong, "Rose told me yesterday when she tried to check in on you that she grabbed your arm for you to stay and not slam the door in her face, she saw you wince and your sleeve rolled up," You couldn't say anything, the evidence was already uncovered and you just look at her still with the same way you did before, the overly cheerful smile but then you frown. Giving her a look of acceptance instead. There's no point in denying anything anymore. "Y/N," she says but you still say nothing. Her nerves are evident, even as worry ran deep through her veins. "Please tell me. I just need to know."