Love, Moony

Remus is a Dumb-Ass

CW: talk about eating disorder (skip remus and regulus texts if you don't want to read it, it's sort of implied a few sentences before the texts start), some sexual talk, kind of,

November 13th, 2020
Gryffindor Table, The Great Hall
8:03 AM
"Lily I'm a dumb-ass. I mean it's been so obvious this entire time. I just...fuck I can't believe it's him." Remus said, in between spoons of cereal.
Lily sipped her tea, "How exactly did you figure this out?"
"I fucking heard him say, quote, 'Remus is Moony and I'm extremely fucked.' end quote. Like it has to be him doesn't it?" Remus asked, rhetorically.
      "God this is so much messier than I ever thought it could be," she looked up at the ceiling, which mimicked the cloudy gray sky that hung about the castle, "what ever did I do to deserve this?"
      "Ummm do you really want me to answer that because I have a list." Mary answered .
       "I could probably add on." Remus responded. Mary giggled. Marlene looked away from where Dorcas sat at the Hufflepuff table, (finally, Remus thought) and rolled their eyes.
       "Mary, love, Remus is off the market, you know this. Flirting would be pointless." Marlene said.
       Mary flushed, "I...I wasn't flirting." She muttered and moved from the table.
     Mary knocked into Sirius as she left the Great Hall, "Oi, watch it MacDonald!" Sirius called after her, as he took the seat previously filled by Mary, across from Remus and next to Marlene.
Remus reached for Sirius' glass and placed a tea bag in it, he picked up the kettle and poured the water over, "You need to stop drinking coffee, love." He said, placing the cup in front of his partner.
Sirius sat mouth agape for a moment, "And why's that Mo- Rem?" Lily looked at him with a raised eyebrow.
"I think it's the reason why you can't sleep at night," Remus concluded, "I don't mind reading to you in the middle of the night, but when I can sleep, you're restless, gets a tad annoying."
Lily looked surprised, "You two share a bed?" Remus nodded.
"You guys started dating, like what two weeks ago? Isn't it a bit soon?" Lily finished.
"You act as if we haven't been shagging for that entire two weeks." Sirius smirked into his cup.
Remus looked down, suddenly very interested into how his cereal was floating.
"REMUS JOHN! I cannot believe you!" Lily playfully smacked his arm.
"Lily I literally told you that we hooked up and then they asked me out, you shouldn't be surprised." He responded.
"You're middle name is John?" Sirius asked.
"Shit it, Orion." Remus responded.
"Anyways, back to the fact that you shagged before you were actually dating!" Lily added extra emphasis on shagged.
"You had to know that we would shag eventually, you can only imagine the sexual tension all the arguing had caused." Sirius shrugged.
Remus contemplated scolding Sirius for his open talk about their sex life over breakfast, of all things, or responding with something that would surely make Sirius blush. Remus decided that the latter had a much more rewarding effect.
"And god did it make it good," Remus added, "God, everything was so rushed in the best way, and you did that-"
"Not that I don't just love hearing about my brother getting railed, could we maybe not talk about this around me. I still have some innocence." Regulus said taking a seat next to Remus, James following him and taking a seat next to Sirius.
"You say that like I didn't find you in bed with James in nothing but boxers last night." Sirius responded a moment later. James chocked on his pumpkin juice. Remus let out a laugh.
"Eh, what can I say, James is cute when he's writhing under you." Regulus shrugged. James blushed and his face turned an unhealthy shade of purple. Remus cackled and Lily shaking her head.
"Am I the only person who isn't getting laid?" Lily asked. Everyone took a quick look at each other and then nodded.
"Don't worry Lily, I'm sure Severus would be lovely in bed." Regulus said as he patted her hand before bursting into laughter, James, Sirius, and Remus joining in soon after.
"Oh my god, the mental image I got, please never again. It was like a whole nother circle of hell." Lily concluded.
Just as James was about to start talking, Rita Skeeter approached the gaggle of Gryffindors and the lone Slytherin.
James let out a sigh, as the blonde opened her mouth, "Morning all! Sirius," she paused, smiling like an idiot, "Remus, I'm the writer of a quite popular story on Wattpad, and I was wondering if you two were alright with having a character based off of yourselves?"
Remus looked across at Sirius and back at Rita, "Alright." He responded with a shrug.
Sirius just nodded his response, "Just maybe don't have us die in this one, alright?"
Rita nodded, "Oh and Jammie, when you get tired of running around with Slytherins little reject, you know where to find me." She said with a wink, as she walked off. Regulus stared at his empty plate.
James, seeing both the look of self-conciseness and the empty plate commented, "As if I'd ever want anyone but you, Reg." as he added a spoon of fresh fruit.
Regulus looked up at James and then back at the plate, he started to say something along the lines of 'James, I really don't want this.'
"For me?" James whispered.
Goddamn eyes, Regulus thought.
"Fine." Regulus mumbled as he picked up a fork.
"Thank you." James added, leaning up to kiss the top of the younger boys head.
"How do manage to-" Sirius started but was cut off by Remus.
"Reg, you want some toast?" Regulus shook his head.
"I...can't if that makes any sense." Regulus mumbled.
"Makes perfect sense, I get it, honest." Remus added, hoping Regulus would get what he was saying.
"Really?" Regulus looked up, eyes wide in surprise. Remus nodded.
"What the fuck did we just witness?" Sirius whispered to James.
"Not a fucking clue, mate." James whispered back.
____
Sometime later idk

Regulus: so i'm guessing you used to have an ed?

Remus: Sort of
Remus: I was never really diagnosed
Remus: I just kinda went through phases of I wouldn't eat anything out in front of me
Remus: It was odd ik

Regulus: oh
Regulus: thank you for not pressing me earlier

Remus: Of course
Remus: Anytime you wanna talk, I'm here Reg
Remus: That goes for anything, mental health, ed's, etc etc
Remus: Anything

Regulus: thank you
Regulus: Sirius tries his best but
Regulus: idk it's just different
Regulus: he doesn't really know what it's like ifykwim

Remus: Yea
Remus: Well if you ever need anything
Remus: I'm here
____
Author: this chapter lowkey sucks sorry