Wicked Hearts

Chapter 33

Chapter 33: Decision

My sister told me everything.

I was sobbing the whole time.

No matter how vibrantly painted her words were, I could only see black and white. No explanation could make my situation less painful.

This is the reality and there's no escaping it.

I will be soon moving with them.

My sister fell asleep in my bed. It hurt me more knowing she has been enduring the truth all this time. It made sense now. How she unusually didn't care about my birthday. That's because there would be no celebration at all.

I put a portion of the cake in my mouth. Kaunti lang 'yon pero nahirapan pa akong lunukin. I was eating while staring at the oblivion and thinking about everything. Minsan ay manginginig ang labi ko dahil sa pagpipigil na umiyak.

I couldn't imagine a day without my sister. Now, I had to live my life without her. Buong buhay ko ay sa kanya ako nakadipende. Maybe I was being a happy-go-lucky girl because I knew that, with her, I had nothing to worry about. My sister would do anything for me.

A tear fell on my eyes. Mabilis ko 'yong hinawi saka uminom ng tubig. I put the cake in the refrigerator. Saka ako pumasok sa kwarto ko. Mahimbing pa rin ang tulog ni Ate Sarah. May bakas pa rin ng luha sa gilid ng kanyang mukha.

Sumikip ang dibdib ko. Minabuti kong kumuha na lang ng jacket saka lumabas ng bahay. Kinuha ko ang bisikleta ko saka umalis panandalian.

I was crying all the way to nowhere. Basta ang gusto ko lang ay magpakalayo muna sa bahay. Sobrang daming bumabagabag sa isipan ko.

Alam ba 'to nina Amanda at Chester? Ito ba ang dahilan kaya mabilis na humupa ang issue sa pagitan namin ni Ulrich? Is this my father's way of getting me?

I shook my head. My father has died the moment he left us. Hindi ko kailanman matatanggap na ama ko si Mr. Megardon. Si Ate Sarah lang ang pamilya ko.

My feet brought me to the shoreline. Tinabi ko ang bisikleta sa gilid saka umupo sa mapinong buhangin. Sapat ang pwesto ko para maabutan ng tubig ang aking mga paa.

I stared at the body of water. Every time the water touches my feet, it reminds me that everything is real. I can feel the cold water, my throbbing heart, the salty breeze, and the loneliness of this night.

"Celebrate my birthday with them?" I laughed, ironically. Yumuko ako saka pinaragasa ang mga daliri ko sa mapinong buhangin. "I would rather not celebrate it at all."

What's the point of celebrating something special to you when the most special person in your life is not with you? I don't see the point in doing it.

That was one of the hardest nights of my life.

Paano na si Ate Sarah?

Mas nag-aalala ako para sa kanya. Marami na siyang pinagdaanan sa buhay. Hindi niya man sabihin sa akin, alam kong napapagod na rin siya. Marami ng bagay ang pinagkait sa kanya, ama, ina, kasintahan... tapos maging ako ay kukunin din sa kanya?

She's been strong for me all her life. Halos binuhos niya sa akin lahat ng oras at pagmamahal niya. She needs me more than ever. This time... I want to be strong for her.

Hinawi ko ang luha sa mga mata ko.

I will be strong for her.

Tumulala ako sa dagat nang ilang oras. It didn't actually feel that long. Nilunod ako ng isipan ko sa napakaraming bagay. Napilitan lang akong umuwi nung nagsimulang umulan.