What You Can't See (rewritten, check profile!)

-Chapter 6-

-Denki pov-

I stare up at the ceiling, this is so boring, why can't I just leave? Like I get that Aizawa wants to protect me, but still, locking me in a fucking room, why don't you just put me in a metal asylum while you're at it. I sat up expecting to feel my ribs dying, I looked down surprised, I couldn't feel anything. What the hell, Aizawa must've gotten Recovery Girl to heal me, wait, would she have noticed the scars, the fact that I haven't been eating that much, nor drinking. Oh fuck, what if she told Aizawa, what if he told my father?

My father told me that I had to keep it hidden, what's he going to do when he finds out this. What's gonna happen to me? I don't actually care about that. What's gonna happen to my friends? To Mr Aizawa? To my sister? They're all gonna die and it's going to be my fault, everything's my fault, I can't do anything right. The worlds better off without me, I should just end it, no one would miss me. I'm a failure, a mistake, a fucking waste of space and everyone knows it. But they're kind enough to actually tolerate me, but I know they hate me, everyone does, everyone should.

Without realising it, I had pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I was crying and shaking. I clutched my hands to my head, grabbing onto my hair, trying to find something to ground me. I gripped my head tighter, my nails digging into my skull, I was a fucking mistake, a mistake, nothing more, just a mistake. It was like my father said, I was weak and pathetic, he was right, I should just listen to him, I should just die. My hands kept clawing, like it could save me. I was going insane and the worst part of it, I was well aware.

I needed help, but I know I don't deserve it, I keep crying. Crying at the fact I'm useless, that I'm meaningless, that no one notices, that no one cares. I was done, life was so hard, there was no point in trying anymore. I laid back down and looked up at the roof again and put on my signature smile, except this time it looked slightly insane. "Who gives a fuck" I say.

"I do," I hear a voice in the doorway again, Shinso, great, I fucking trusted him, and he did that to me. I glare at him, still angry, but not having the energy to make it seem like it. I sigh and sit back up, I refuse to talk to him, I'm not risking that to happen again. I gesture to my rib and hope he's smart enough to understand. He looks at me, clearly sad I'm not talking to him. "Recovery Girl healed your rib, she advised you to rest and eat something healthy." I nodded, I looked at the door and he sighed "you can leave when you want, we're in the nurse's office." I nod again and start to get up, reaching for my bag.

-Shinso pov-

I see him getting his bag, for some reason I don't want him to leave. He clearly isn't okay and needs help. God, I wish I knew how to help him, I need to apologise, he didn't deserve that interrogation. "Hey Kaminari" I say hesitantly, he turns towards me, he glares at me, but instead of his eyes looking angry, they just look tired. I swallow, "I'm really sorry, Mr Aizawa told me that I should do it and that it would benefit you, and since you're the only person who actually wanted to be my friend, I wanted to help you, but that was wrong and I shouldn't of done it, I'm really sorry" I blurted out.

Kaminari stared at me, clearly trying to understand what I just said. He turns away again, and I curse at myself, I messed it up, again, fuck. He grabbed his bag and walked to the door, he opened it and stood in the doorway. He faces me again, "it's okay, just please don't do it again" he says, before walking away, I stare after him, he talks to me again, he trusts me again. In any normal situation I would be ecstatic but his voice sounded so shaky, so broken. I remember walking in on him saying who gives a fuck, he sounded like he had given up, why? What was wrong with Kaminari, and how the fuck could I help?

Okay, done, sorry it's really short. I'm reading over it, and this chapter really does suck. I'm sorry for not updating in forever, I will try to update this every weekend but don't be surprised if I disappear for another 2 months. Thank you all so much for the support, I'm really happy that you guys actually like this and I promise the next chapter will be better, be prepared for more angst :). If you have any criticism or ideas, please don't hesitate to tell me, it'll be greatly appreciated. Stay safe, wear a mask if you go outside and remember to drink water and get a good amount of sleep! See you guys later, ily <3.