So This Is Love?

Part 21: A Late Night Call

~Nov. 10th 2021*30 wksPregnant*~

The last few months since leaving Ryan at the hospital- Freema has dealt with the frustration and upset of doing everything alone.

She always imagined when she found out she was pregnant- that Ryan would go to every appointment with her.

Go to find out the sex of the baby with her.

But he missed it by a week.

He rather throw a cowardly fit than let her in.

Let her know how much he's struggling.

Let her know that he needs her.

Going to that appointment alone- that hurt her so deeply. She didn't get to enjoy it as much as she would have.

Finding out that she's having a sweet little girl, just wasn't as exciting as it could have been.

Who wants to find that out alone?

Her sister and mother- brother- were all in England. Janet was gone as well. And no other person seemed appropriate enough to ask them to sit with her during such and important day.

How would Ryan have taken the news?

Would he even want a little girl?

Don't all fathers to be want sons?

To teach them sports and bond over manly activities.

When they have girls, they're resigned to boring tea parties or dress up. Playing pretend house. Make up. Princesses.

No man willing wants a daughter.

They're either forced into it with resentment.

Or they bail.

Maybe Ryan knew she'd have a girl on the way.

Maybe that's why he went from caring to absent.

She feels that would be better than him just wanting to kill himself.

Laying down in bed tonight- mind flooded with things she needs to do before the baby comes in 10 weeks, she tries to keep a mental list of supplies she has yet to receive from friends and family- despite her asking them not to.

They don't need to spend money on her or her baby.

She has more than enough of her own.

But they still wanted to help.

Still wanted to shower the baby in gifts.

After all- you only ever have one baby shower.

And Freema will only ever be able to have this one baby.

So it seemed fit for her friends and loved ones to do this for her. Especially since quite a few knew the truth about the father and his absence.

Yet none of them said anything against him.

Or her for that matter.

There was no point in doing so.

Freema is a strong independent woman and Ryan- though very caring and sweet- is a younger man with a lot on his plate.

Laying on her side, hand resting on the side of her stomach, she's just about to sleep when she feels the baby girl kick.

"Of course you're ready to play...just when Mummy is finally ready to sleep." Stroking her hand up and down her stomach. She can't help but think back to twelve weeks ago when she first felt her kick. It scared her at first.