tw- panic attack
"darling", I heard Sarah say from behind me standing in the doorway, leading onto the balcony of our hotel room
I looked back at, before turning to look at the view again, leaning against the railing
"I'm sorry", Sarah wrapped her arms around me from behind, her naked body pressing against my robe
"you should go back inside", I said plainly
"you don't have to pretend to be okay holland", Sarah kisses the back of my neck
"no, its just that you're naked and I don't want the whole world seeing you", I smiled turning around, pulling her waist closer to me
"come inside with me?", Sarah pouted, I nodded following Sarah inside
I closed the door behind, turning around to see Sarah laying on the bed staring at me
"its rude to stare you know", I looked Sarah up and down
"come here", she said quietly
"you know, I'm really okay", I said sitting next to Sarah, placing my hand on her bare stomach
Sarah didn't say anything she just opened her arms, indicating for me rest in her embrace
"are you cold?", I asked
"a little why?", Sarah questioned confused
"your nipple is poking my cheek", I smiled
"oh my god", Sarah laughed
"what time is it?", I mumbled
"its five thirty, you shouldn't even be awake yet", Sarah brushed her fingers through my hair
"I couldn't sleep"
"I know", Sarah kissed the top of my hair "talk to me", she whispered
"I'm okay", I insisted
"talk to me", Sarah repeated
"I just miss her, but I do everyday. I'm okay honey, I promise"
"why don't you try get some sleep then? Hmm?", Sarah lifted my head, looking down at me
"I can't sleep", I shook
"come on love, talk to me", Sarah moved so that she was spooning me from behind, placing a kiss on my shoulder
"I don't know what you want me to say"
--
I stood in the mirror, watching as Sarah did up the back of my dress
"there you go darling", Sarah said, placing her hands on my shoulders
"thank you"
"sit down ill get your shoes", Sarah smiled, walking over the suit cases
I sat down on the edge of the bed, hanging my head low.
Sarah came back, kneeling in front of me, sliding on my little heels before looking up at me.
"oh sweetheart", Sarah whispered, wiping my tear with her thumb
"im okay", I choked
Sarah lay her head on my lap, holding my hand, my free hand made its way to her hair
"I love you"
"I love you", I replied weakly
"we have to go", Sarah stood up kindly
