Should've slept alone (Damon Albarn)

Chapter Four

Charlotte didn't know what to do, she felt frozen to the spot, her back to Graham as a wave of nausea washed over her. She'd waited for this moment, a moment where she could tell someone the truth, someone who could actually make a difference, ever since she found out she was pregnant, but now she wasn't so sure she actually wanted to face it.

"Is it that obvious?" She laughed nervously, her words coming out in almost a whisper. She tensed up slightly as she heard Graham walk closer to her, she wasn't willing to face him just yet.

"Crystal clear" He said lightly, stopping in front of Charlotte so that she had no choice but to look at him "well, to me anyway"

Charlotte didn't really know what to say, she couldn't read the look on Graham's face and so, she dropped her eyes down to the ground, suddenly finding hers and Graham's shoelaces the most interesting thing around.

"He doesn't know, does he?" He asked quietly, Charlotte shook her head nervously, every part of her absolutely hating this confrontation.

"It was completely coincidental, I had no idea he would be here when I was assigned the job, he just seems to have taken such a liking to Fred" Charlottes words came tumbling out of her mouth, the speed increasing the more that she spoke "Does he know?"

"Damon?" Charlotte nodded her head, whilst she hadn't told him she couldn't help but wonder, especially if it was as obvious as Graham said it was "Not that I know of"

"Well it can't be as obvious as you say then" She blurted out, suddenly feeling very defensive of the situation "Freddie's even called him Dad"

"Yeah, well Damon can be oblivious when he wants to"

They fell into an uncomfortable silence, Charlotte didn't really have anything else she wanted to say to Graham and she was very aware that the longer she spent here, the longer she was away from Freddie for.

"You need to tell him" Graham suddenly spoke, his words were sharp and hit her right in her stomach.

"I know" She responded quietly "Do you think he's going to want to be Freddie's dad?"

Graham's silence and sympathetic smile when they made eye contact told Charlotte everything she needed to know. She instantly felt sick to her stomach and she wasn't entirely sure why, she'd never pictured Damon being in Freddie's life and she wasn't sure why she felt so disappointed after two brief encounters.

"He did seem so happy with him" Graham mumbled, Charlotte appreciated his feeble attempt to try and make her feel better "I'd really like for him to prove me wrong, he'd make a great Dad"

It didn't take long for Charlotte to finish up, she didn't really have anything to say to Graham and he didn't to her either. Instead, they had a slightly awkward goodbye before she left in search of the cafe, where she couldn't help but smile at the sight of Damon's and Freddie drawing together.

"Sorry, I finished up as quick as I could" She gushed as she rushed over to their table, placing a kiss on top of Freddie's head before smiling at Damon.

"It's fine, we were having a lovely time" Damon grinned up at her, looking after Freddie had been far easier than he could've expected "Can I get you anything?"

"No, I'm okay thank you" She responded, though the words pained her to say, she was so hungry she was beginning to feel nauseous "We should probably get going"

She picked Freddie up from his seat, who started to scream and throw his legs around as soon as he realised he was being taken away from Damon.

"Actually, I erm, I said to Freddie I'd take him to the park" Damon told her, standing up from his seat, Charlotte nodded her head and smiled gratefully at him.

"Are you sure? Honestly, you don't need to do that" She tried to convince him how unnecessary his company was. She wanted more than anything for him to accompany them, but with Graham's words spinning in her mind she wasn't sure how much longer she could keep it a secret for.

"I'd really like to" He flashed a small smile at Charlotte before pulling his coat on "If you don't mind?"

"Be our guest" She reassured him, placing Freddie in his pushchair before walking through the door Damon had opened for them.

They made comfortable conversation between themselves and Charlotte was completely surprised at just how easy Damon was to talk to and how effortlessly the conversation flowed between them. She knew by the silence coming from Freddie that he'd fallen asleep, and she wasn't surprised they were right on time for his nap, but she didn't want to tell Damon that. She was planning on acting surprised at her child's sudden sleeping once they reached the park.

They sat down on a bench overlooking the swings and Charlotte let out her best and most convincing gasp as she turned the pushchair around and realised that Freddie was, indeed, asleep. Damon laughed as he realised he was asleep and Charlotte prepared for him to leave, but instead he lent back into the bench, getting himself as comfortable as he could on the slightly damp wooden bench.

As much as Charlotte loved having Damon sat, so relaxed, next to her a part of her couldn't help but feel uneasy in his presence. If he really didn't know the truth about Freddie then why had he taken such a shining to him? As lovely as it was for Charlotte, who knew the truth, if Freddie truly was a stranger then it would just be weird for Damon to be so lovely towards him.

"Why are you here Damon?" She suddenly asked, her words coming out far sharper than she intended.

"I, erm" He laughed nervously, an unsure smile coming over his face as he ran a hand through his hair "I don't really know"

"But you must do" She insisted, smiling reassuringly at him in the hope it would make up for her, rather harsh, previous words "You must have so much you need to do, and yet, you're sat in the park with people you don't even know"

"It's a nice escape" He said quietly, his fingers moving to play with the zip of his jacket "Being with Freddie just made me feel normal, there was no worries and nothing for me to stress about and I could just get away from everything for a few hours"

Charlotte didn't really know what to say to Damon, she wasn't oblivious to the constant headlines which had recently seemed to include him, but at the same time, she didn't realise it was taking a toll on him as much as it seemed to be. She reached across and took hold of his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze and flashing him a smile when their eyes met.

"And you're really pretty" he said softly, his sudden intense gaze making Charlotte blush "Beautiful really"

Charlotte shook her head, but that compliment coming from someone as good looking as him, made butterflies start to flutter around her stomach.

"Freddie really likes you" Charlotte told him, choosing to ignore his compliment as she didn't really know what to say back to him "You're actually, well you're actually the only person he's ever been left with"

"Really?" Damon scoffed, he couldn't possibly see how he was the first person "What about your parents?"

"No, they erm, well everyone really cut ties when I got pregnant at 19 from a one night stand" She tried to laugh as she spoke to lighten the severity of the words she was speaking, but the reality of what had happened still hurt her.

This time, it was Damon's turn to squeeze her hand, she had actually forgotten that they'd kept on holding onto one another. It had felt completely natural, like he was just an extension of her body.

"Well look, I'm always more than happy to help out" Damon told her with a grin, which made Charlotte's hopes go up slightly "Even if you just need a breather from him, if I'm around I'll always be happy to help"

Charlotte nodded her head as she digested his words, she was sure that he was just saying it to be nice and there was no real substance to his offer. But she still couldn't help the thoughts going round in her head, maybe he would be more willing to be in Freddie's life than Graham had told her?

"There's something I need to tell you actually Damon" She told him, already regretting the words as soon as they were out of her mouth "About Freddie's Dad"