You promised and you swore but all you ever did was lie. Time after time, until you had nothing left to say. You poisoned us, leaving me to soak up the damage. I screamed harsh words in hopes you would hear me. No, in hopes you would see me, but I did not succeed. In truth, I never would have succeeded. Because you were never ready to listen. You screamed back so roughly, until all that existed was us. You and me. Fire and ice. Pain and war. Hatred and fear. The words I never would have dreamt to say are the only ones left that come to mind. You ruined us with your volatile actions and never cared to see the hurt you were leaving behind. You begged me to believe you, day after day without giving me cause to. You never thought you needed to. My trust is not something blindly given yet you expected it anyway. It is not something to be used and mistreated, but that was all I received from you. I pleaded time after time for you to help me. To help me feel safe. To help me feel okay. To help me feel anything. Because in the end, I felt nothing. Nothing but anger. Anger for our cruel screams. Anger for our cruel encounters. Anger for you never trying to get better. You took everything from me, by taking the boy I fell in love with. The boy who promised me the world. The boy I believed that would deliver it. You never thought I could survive without you. But I am. I got better for me because you never could. I am okay for me because I could not rely on you to be anymore. And I started by saying goodbye.
YOU ARE READING
Girl In Healing
ŞiirLittle sweet nothings I began to write myself at a young age that turned to madman ramblings, I'm writing this book not as a cry for help but as a beacon to every soul who became lost the same way I did.
