It's More of a "Hate, Hate" Thing... (Liam Payne)

Chapter Twenty-Six: Hello Mr. Boyfriend

Alex’s POV

“Mother, I’m going out!” I called as I jumped off the last stair. My mother, who was sitting at the kitchen table looked up at me with shock clear in her expression.

“You’re going where?” she asked after a second.

“Out.” I shrugged, walking into the living room and pulling my shoes on. She stood up and followed me.

“With who exactly?” she asked skeptically. I knew she was confused as I had been locking myself away since the boys had left and last night I hadn’t even wanted to speak to her.

“I don’t know, Jules, Jo, Shannon, Brianna… someone.” I shrugged, naming the list of people I used to be really close to. I had drifted away from all but Jules since the boys’ visit and I’m sure those are names that my Mom is happy to hear again. My suspicions we confirmed as she perked up a bit.

“Well where are you going to be going?” she pressed.

“I don’t know, what’s up with the twenty questions all of a sudden?” I asked as I pulled my jacket on over my shoulders.

“Well you haven’t been the most sociable person recently. You’ve seemed to have a complete mood adjustment in one night. Not that I’m not happy about it, I’m just… confused.” She said thinking it over as she spoke. “But whatever.” She told me throwing her hands up in defense. “Go out and have fun. It’s better than sitting down moping all day like I thought you would have.” She shrugged before returning to the kitchen. I sighed a bit when I realized that she was right. I would have still been laying in my bed right now, the emotional pain continuing to rip me apart. I bit my lip lightly when I realized what I was thinking about doing tonight before Liam showed up. I wouldn’t have left my room… ever again maybe. I let out a breath as I shoved the money I had in my hand into my pocket.

I was about to leave when I noticed something on the ground underneath the coat rack. My brow furrowed in confusion as I bent down to pick it up. My face lightened and a smile spread slowly on my lips as I recognized the batman hat I had been so attached to the past month. I tried to remember how it got back there, but then remembered what happened the Tuesday after the boys left.

I walked in the door, tears slowly rolling down my face. I was home alone thank God. I could finally just let it all go.

It was only the second day after the boys had left and I was ready to explode. It seemed that everyone was talking about the boys or something that reminded me off them and I was starting to lose it. I just missed them so much.

And I hate the fact that Liam’s the one I missed the most.

I still remembered Saturday night visibly. Every touch, every kiss, every word. It kept replaying in my head, drilling the knife deeper and deeper into my heart.

I walked over and slumped onto the couch collapsing into a ball of tears. I couldn’t do this without them. At least they had been here over the last month when Liam was hurting me. Now he had hurt me the most anyone ever has and they weren’t even here to console me.

I felts my hat fall off my head and tumble onto the floor. I looked over at it, the symbol on the front of it blurred by the tears in my eyes. I stared at it, all of the emotions bubbling up in my stomach. The love, the hate, the longing, the anger. Everything.

“Why did you do this to me Liam?” I croaked out. Talking to a hat. I was definitely sane. “Why was I never good enough for you?”

I had worn the hat today in hopes to find comfort in it as it always seemed to bring me even if Liam was being a complete jerk. Just knowing that he had gotten this for me and that somewhere deep down he may have actually cared, was comforting.