Chasing Innocence | ✓

22 | growing denial

It begins to rain in the parking lot of the town's park. I leave the engine running, the windscreen wipers working hard to clear my view. I'm blasting the heater, warming my hands over the vents.

Because my phone had died, I'd driven to the closest pay phone available and called Maia's number. She'd picked up instantly, as though she somehow knew it was me.

My passenger door opens, revealing Maia bundled in a long great coat and a matching beanie. Her dark skin has a slight rosey tinge to her cheeks as she sighs, closing the door on the cold.

"I tell you," she shivers, "this winter is way too damn cold."

"You say that every year," I smile softly. "It's that endless cycle where you forget how hot summer is in winter and how cold winter is in summer."

She turns to me, holding out her frosted hands. I take them in my warm ones, clasping our fingers together. "Firstly, I'm sorry," she says, breathless. "I always bully Layla for speaking before she thinks, but I'm just as bad. Or worse, really. Because maybe I did know what I was saying and I did it anyway.

"I just — I don't want this to be an excuse, because I was in the wrong — but sometimes it's hard for me to let go of things. I saw how badly your brother hurt you, and I couldn't just sit around pretending I was okay that he was in our home. And when I saw how you were really trying, it made it even harder for me. It was as though you'd been through all this pain and trauma just for you to pretend that you were fine.

"And you have to realise, Rhea, that since you took on that internship, you haven't been fine. You've changed. You've become obsessed again with Braxton's case. Just like how you became obsessed with— I don't need to remind you. That isn't my point. I need you to realise that it's okay to relapse. Just talk to me, though."

When she stops, I begin to take in everything she's told me. It takes a few seconds, her words spewing out of her like she's waited a long time to tell me. Maybe she has.

"And don't scare me by shutting me out. I was terrified when Layla told me you weren't safe," tears swim in her eyes as she clutches my hands tighter, as though she's afraid to let go. "If you can't live with us, fine. But tell me first."

"It's not forever," I start, not knowing where else to begin. "Just until the trial is over."

"You're in danger because of Brax, aren't you?" she sniffs. "Everything bad that is happening is circling back to him. You see that right?"

I sigh, closing my eyes. "It'll be alright," I urge.

"Where are you staying?" she pleads. "At least give me that."

"With Brax and his family."

"Where?"

"Not far from home," I promise, vaguely. "If I need you, it wouldn't take long to get to each other."

She pulls her hands from mine, rubbing a hand over her face. "I don't like this, but I can hardly stop you, can I?"

I lean my head against her shoulder, closing my eyes briefly. "I know you're doing this for Lay and I," she whispers. "I hope you know that you being away is harder than us fighting whatever is going on together."

Despite her words, I disagree. There is no need for me to put them in harms way if I can avoid it.

"At least keep talking to your therapist," she murmurs. "Promise me that."

I hold out my pinky, and she wraps it around mine. We hold it there for a while, an unspoken bond that should never be broken.