Pretty Girl

Chapter Thirty Four - June 5th 2020

Chapter Thirty Four

Alex's Pov - 31 Years Old

You would only realise how insignificant everything else seemed if you had your own Katrina. Nothing was more important than her and that was the exact feeling I felt as I monotonously watched a man explain his business proposal to me. This was a normal part of my life where I invested and looked over new, small businesses sometimes as you never know what kind of opportunities would jump right at you. Another hour and I'd be done with this.

I looked down at the conference table to see a gift from Agatha and that reminded me that I had to get over to the hospital tonight. My residency was finally over and I was going to be conducting my first surgery. I had no fear when it came down to it because if it wasn't for the fact that I had to complete my residency due to legal reasons and for my damn diploma, I knew for a fact that I could've been performing surgeries atleast four years ago, easily. This just came to me. It was how my mind worked. I was hungry for information, knowledge and anything that interested me.

It pestered me because I knew I could've saved lives with everything I had retained over the years if I had been allowed to perform them on my own. Even the actual surgeons there weren't up to the mark sometimes and that seriously bothered the hell out of me. I'm not saying I can save everyone's life but at the same time I do know I'd be able to think of fifty different scenarios to save someone that nobody else there could even imagine. All they need to do is think out of the box and they're too lazy and unbothered to do that. How do I know this? Because I've done it before.

Agatha was the grandmother of nine year old Ramos who had a brain aneurysm. He suffered every day with terrible headaches until he was diagnosed. The surgeons that he had thought it was too late for him and that was a very low chance of making it. His file came into my hands and I was livid. The surgeons had decided to go with endovascular coiling just because it was safer when the best thing for him at that point was to go with the surgical clipping procedure. I did some more research and asked for his health records to see if there was more that I could find and I did. There was a few other ways that the surgeons hadn't even considered which would've reduced the risk Ramos faced and also easily sealed off the aneurysm.

Agatha was one of the many wonderful people that I'd met in situations like this and that was honestly when I felt even more helpless and desperate to finish up my residency and actually do the best that I could to help these people.

I'm a direct contradiction of the oath that doctors took. I've taken lives and done more harm than ever but I'm trying to save lives as well. It's like for every evil soul I take, I want to breathe back life into a good one.

Does it redeem me? No. Because I don't want to be fucking redeemed. I'm doing it because I want to. I may have started out with wanting to do it for Cassie and Caleb but now it just feels right. I've seen so many good people and children who have stupid surgeons who don't do their best and people who are denied good doctors because they don't have enough money.  So many surgeons do their job because they're paid to and that's the difference with me. I already have more than enough money so I don't care if I get paid or not.
It pissed me off so I'm going to change it.

I don't know why I've always felt like I needed to do this though. It's as though for some reason becoming a neurosurgeon was incredibly important and I have a purpose that hasn't been fulfilled yet. I've felt this way all my life but I know that time hasn't come yet. The real reason. I honestly don't know why a part of me needs it.

I looked down towards my phone as I realised that it's almost eleven pm and I stop the man who's speaking and tell him to get home because it would be difficult for him to leave after this and I had to get to the hospital.