Arrowverse woman imagines

Suicidal? (Felicity Smoak)

Trigger warning mentions of suicide and self harm⚠️
(Your also Barry's sister)

Your POV

"Felicity this is a shit time to pop in central city" I say looking up at my crush "why are you ok" she places her hand on mine "no...Barry is still out of commission because of Savatar's attack he brought Barry back to our mother's death the worst of his memory's and it's awful but I can't let him take me back to my worst memory I was in a dark place and really stupid I just can't see it again" I choke out, tears streaming down my face "well in that case I'm staying" I shake my head "no it's to dangerous I can't let you get hurt" I wipe my tears and look around jitters hoping no one saw me breakdown "y/n I'm not leaving you in this state besides you know who I work with I'm always in danger" I knew she wasn't going to take no for an answer "how about we go back to Joes and we can watch something okay" I nod grabbing my hot chocolate and leaving the coffee shop.

The movie is over I'm about to fall asleep till I see lightning in the room Felicity held me tighter "y/n Allen everyone think Barry's worst memory was so very tragic but yours is so much worse you say your strong and stable you keep your family safe but when will you break and will it be like the first time" he taunts, the blonde takes out a gun "stay away from her" he laughs "a gun is useless against me I AM A GOD" he says then picking me and Felicity up running us to the past, to my high school my worst year.

I'm standing on the roof of the school looking down about to jump "Y/N please get down" Barry's voice "I can't do this Barry moms dead and dad was framed for it all I have is this stupid scar on my arm to remind me about how mom died everyone thinks I'm crazy no one believes me so much therapy and yet all it does is make me worse why should I stay in such a fucked up world" I cry out "because I'm here y/n/n I can't loose you too we have to stick together" I look back at my older brother "your better off without me goodbye Barry" I drop from the roof of my high school.

I look away as my body hits the ground blood everywhere Barry screaming I fall to my knees seeing Barry scream "Y/N NOOO, PLEASE, SOMEONE HELP PLEASE ANYONE CALL 911 PLEASE" tears falling I put him through so much more then he already had to I was selfish alone and broken. Savatar sped us back to the present leaving without a trace "y/n" a quiet voice says I don't respond I just sit on the floor not able to move "please talk to me" still nothing the woman I love just watched me jump off a building "your not alone anymore you don't need to Bottle things up and maybe that's why you hide your feelings because you don't want to burden anyone but I won't let you understand I'm not leaving I'm not running I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere" she sits in front of me lifting my chin she wipes the tears "I was selfish and sad I thought I was doing the world a favour but I just added more to my brothers plate, they took me away to a mental hospital it only made me more lonely and think about the pain and misery I caused so I stopped telling people how I felt" I whisper Felicity hugs me and just holds me "is this a bad time to say I like you more then a friend, Felicity you've stuck around me no matter what and your the second person who witnessed me trying to kill myself and your still here, I am so terrified to say this but I'm also scared not to but if you want to be friends we can" she smiles "I thought I was the one who rambled" she leans in and captures my lips it was a slow gentle kiss and that's exactly what I needed, the door opened and we pulled apart I felt like a kid "hey y/n/n" Joe and Cecile come in and see the stuff knocked over and my cheeks still stained red and eyes puffy "what the hell happened are you two ok" Cecile runs over "we are now Savatar showed up and brought me to my worst memory" Joe lost colour in his face he got the call once I was in the hospital him, Iris and Barry were in the room crying it was one of the hardest things to wake up to Joe came and hugged me "I'm glad your both ok, you should get some sleep that's a lot to see" I nod still hearing Barry scream like that, Cecile gave me a tight hug hiding her tears "you read my mind didn't you" she looked down "I'm sorry you had to relive that sweetheart"
"I uh yeah thanks I'm gonna go lie down" Felicity silently followed I'm positive Cecile read Felicity's mind and probably knows about us.

I get under my covers "I just wanted to make sure you were ok" she went to walk away "wait please I don't want to be alone anymore" I confess the blonde smiles and goes under the covers "come here" I move closer she puts her arms around me and brings me right against her "I've got you y/n your not alone anymore I promise" she says softly and kisses my head while rubbing my back softly I wasn't alone anymore I had someone I never thought that day would come.

So this was a little dark but hope you enjoyed

-Z