The Queen

Chapter 5

TW: panic attack

I look at the clock that's on my nightstand.

5:11 AM.

I've been staring at my ceiling for the past two hours. My dreams, or should I say nightmares, are usually around the same thing. However, lately, my dreams have been different, and not the good kind of different.

They always start with beautiful and mesmerizing melodies, the ones my mother used to sing and my father used to play. I would run after them, trying to find their place of origin, but nothing would work. 

I would call out their names, scream for an answer, but no one would respond.

Today, I could finally see where they came from and they did not align with the beautiful sounds.

Clair de Lune was playing in the background. It fit perfectly with my surroundings. Soft pink clouds decorated the baby blue sky. The flowers shined with the sun as if diamonds were born from it and the grass slightly glowed due to the light. Small and colorful birds were flying, singing melodies only they understood.

"Alexandria!" a voice called. It was someone I recognized in an instance.

"Mom?" unsure if I heard right.

"Alexandria, come here!"

It was her. "Mom?! Mamá, where are you?!"

"I am here, cariño! I am waiting for you in my room!" my mother called.

Not even a second passed, and I sprinted through the halls. Colors were fading away as I ran, everything was becoming lifeless and dull. The sound of the piano was distant and the birds were no longer singing.

"Alexandria, help!" a different voice called. It was my father.

"Please come! Help us!" he desperately said.

I couldn't even respond. I just barged through the doors and founded an image that haunted me every day.

The same way they died 10 years ago.

Their bodies were laying on the floor next to each other, a pool of blood surrounding them. Their limbs were in uncomfortable positions, some broken or torn apart.

My body followed its own mind and walked to them. I could feel how I trembled with every move that I made.

"Alexandria," a soft and suffocated whisper came from my father's mouth. He looked at me with desperation, as if I could do something.

I cradled their heads in my lap, strong sobs coming out of my body.

"No, no, no," I repeat as I see how their lives were slowly getting out of their bodies, once again.

"It's all your fault," they said as they took their last breath.

And there they laid. The people who I love the most, dead in my arms once again.

"NO!" I screamed. I felt how the power inside me was too strong to keep in. I tried to control it but as I screamed and sobbed, I let it all out.

A big burst of flames came out of my hands and chest. The pain was too much. It's all my fault, they died because of me.

I snapped back to reality, feeling a heavyweight in my chest. My hands were already shaking and it became harder to breathe. I tried getting out of my bed but instead, I stumbled to the floor.