South Park Oneshots (Requests Open)

Kenny McCormick // Wish I Were Heather

Date: 4/13/19
Time: 4:56PM
Age: 17
Extra: mostly based off of 'Wish I Were Heather' by Conan Gray. Also, this one ends pretty differently than most my other oneshots. Medium length, 3574 words

TW: Indirect mention of SH and the starting of a sex scene (stops before things really get going)

"Oh, god, Clyde. I don't wanna be here," I said, hugging my twin brother's arm. He had dragged me to another party at Token's house even though he knew that I didn't like parties. "Can you take me home, please?"

"We just got here, Y/N. At least stay for an hour or two," he said with a sigh, looking down at me. "Get some food, dance, just lean against the wall and ignore everyone if you want. But try to just enjoy this for once. If you still aren't having fun in an hour, I'll take you home."

"Fine. But, you have to take me home if I'm not enjoying it. You have to promise me that you'll take me home. Which means no...drinking," I said, remembering when he had gotten drunk within the first hour of us being at a party. I ended up going home alone.

"I promise, Y/N. Now go have fun," he said before patting me on the back and walking off. I sighed and looked around for anyone I knew. I knew Butters and Tweek weren't going to be here so that ruled out my two best friends. But, basically everyone else in my year was here.

"What a sight for sore eyes," I heard someone say. I ignored it, thinking it wasn't about me, until I felt an arm around my shoulders. "What's up, beautiful?"

I looked to my side to see Kenny McCormick, the school's resident player, smirking at me. It was odd seeing him out of his parka for once but he was kind of cute.

"Why don't you go flirt with Bebe or something? I'd rather not get some STD," I said, without thinking.

Though, when did I ever think? I would always ruin things by either overthinking or underthinking. I knew it was likely the reason I didn't have very many friends.

To my surprise though, Kenny only chuckled in response before leaning close to my ear.

"I wasn't thinking of going that far, but if you want to..." He trailed off, kissing my neck before slightly backing away. I could feel my face heat up as I glanced away from Kenny. I could see my brother not too far away and I knew I could easily get his attention if I wanted to. After a few seconds of me staring at Clyde, Kenny followed my line of sight.

"Clyde would destroy you, McCormick," I mumbled out. I heard Kenny let out a low sigh before turning back to me.

"Not if he didn't find out," he said. I rolled my eyes with a huff, pulling myself away from him.

"Well, I still don't want an STD so I'm going to have to decline," I said, giving him a tight smile. He held his hands up, as if surrendering.

"That's cool. But, if you ever want someone to relieve some stress," he said with a wink. "I don't have any STDs."

I could feel my cheeks heat up even as he walked away.

I sighed and turned around, about to walk into the kitchen to get food, when I was stopped by a hand on my arm. I turned around to see Clyde standing in front of me, worry written across his face.

"What the fuck was Kenny doing?" He asked, searching my eyes for any sign of fear. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Nothing. He didn't do anything, Clyde. Anyway, what happened to having fun?" I asked, crossing my arms and raising an eyebrow. He sighed, dropping his arms to his sides.

"Not that kind of fun, Y/N," he said. I inwardly groaned.

"As if you haven't before, Clyde," I said before turning around and walking away.