An Angel Named Niall

Chapter 19

I sat there motionless. All I heard were telephones ringing, I watched the nurses go back and forth, and I breathed in that smell of the hospital. I got chills, not only because of how could it was but because it scared me being in here.

Believe it or not, but there were tears in my eyes. It was like all of a sudden I became grown to the baby. And now it was gone. It was ripped out of me. And it was all my fault.

Grandma came in with a look on her face that i've never seen on her. I watched her slowly walk to my bed and sit down. I knew they had told her about it. I was scared. I wasn't ready for her reaction. 

"They told me what happened." She said avoiding my eyes. She continued. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" 

I stayed quiet. 

"I..."

"Why?! I trusted you."

I was now shedding tears. 

"Who was going to be the dad?"

I didn't know what I was going to tell her. I didn't want to say Matt because I knew she was gonna go to him. I knew he would harrass me more. I wanted to end everything with him.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"I was at a party and I got drunk. I don't remember."

"Wow. This is what you have been doing? that's probably why you lost that poor child." She realized she began raising her voice so she lowered her tone of voice. "We'll talk about this at home."

The doctor came in and said I was welcomed to stay or leave any time. He also said that if I got any abdominal pain again to come back. For a moment I wanted to stay there. I wanted to move in. I wanted to be away from the world even if it meant being stuck in a hospital. 

But of course, we decided to leave. They were already going to charge us. We didn't want to be charged a lot extra for staying the night or something. 

I got changed into my clothes and got wheelchaired out to grandmas old 80s car. I was helped into the car as if I didn't have working legs or if I was not able to move. It was a joke. 

The car ride home was quiet. Not awkward. Just quiet. No music. Just the sound of the cars in the outside. The natural sounds of the world. 

It felt like the car ride was taking longer than it usually did. My grandma has always drove very slow but I felt like now she did it on purpose. Cars would cut her off. She wouldn't go on orange lights. I guess she wanted me to analyze what just happened. 

We finally got home and before going to my room, she called me to the kitchen. 

"Sit down," she said as she sat with her chin resting on her hands. I sat down without starting the conversation.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because."

"That's not an answer. Why? I was still going to find out anyways."

"I was going to tell you. But this happened."

"Why are you treating this situation as if you lost a puppy? You lost a baby. You lost someone who was going to grow up and call you 'mom'. You take this as if it was nothing."

She was right. Having the thought that the child I was carrying was Matts made me feel this way. Made me not take importance of it. I didn't know what to say. I was never good at conversations like these and especially with grandma. 

"Say something, Juliet!"

"I don't know what to say okay! I don't! I've had enough for one day." I got up from my seat. 

"You've had enough? So you think going around with those bad friends of yours, getting drunk is an excuse?"

"Just leave me alone." And I ran to my room. My room was dark, fitting my life perfectly. 

I layed in bed and starred at the roof. Nothing. Just like my mind. 

--

I woke up and walked downstairs. Everyone was there. Grandma, my mom, Niall and his friends, Amy, Josh, and Matt. I was in complete shock. I didn't know whether I was dreaming or not. And there was my Mom. 

I noticed my mom hugging my Grandma. "Mom!" I ran to her. They all followed me with their eyes as I ran to her. When she let go, Grandma was crying. 

"What's wrong? why are you crying?"

"Because of you," my mom said looking directly into my eyes with her hazel eyes. Her eyes were filled with tears and mascara smeared under her lower lashes. 

"What did I do?" I looked at everyone. They all were looking at me with angry eyes. Not one smile. What was going on? 

"What did I do?" I repeated.

"You are making your grandmas life a living hell! You ungrateful brat." My mom told me as she got in my face. 

"You're good for nothing. You don't deserve to live," Matt added. I was getting tears in my eyes.

"Shame on you, Juliet. You're worthless," Niall said. 

I was surrounded by all these people who were yelling at me. Telling me i'm horrible. I'm stupid. I'm useless. 

"Stop! stop! stop!" I yelled as I covered my ears. My mom grabbed my and pushed me to the ground. 

And I woke up. Sweating, hyperventilating, and with my heart beating. I curled up my legs and began crying. That was so vivid. I was scared. I was feeling more horrible than I ever did. It was like those words were actually told to me. 

I decided to go down stairs. 

I walked slowly, looking around for any one in sight. I reached the kitchen and my grandma was there. 

"Goodmorning," she told me as she poured hot water in a cup.

I was still in shock. I was still expecting for them to all come out of nowhere and yell at me.

"Are you okay?" She went to me and put her hand against my forehead. "You're so cold and you're sweating. Sit down. i'll make you some soup."

"No, no. I'm fine. I just had a bad dream."

"No, sit down. I'm making you some soup."

I sat down and put my  hands over my face. I sighed and was glad it was only a dream.  

-------------------

So thank you for those who are reading. Means a whole lot!!! really! I will probably be ending it soon. 

I will be writing another story when I'm done with this one. I'm prett excited.

but THANK YOU  for reading. i'll update soon :)