Marauders Tales

Part 8

IDK WHAT TO CALL THIS PART PLEASE HELP-

~Sirius's POV~

OH SH*T! I say to myself in the shower that night, thankfully muffled by the charms I put up and the running water. This explains so much! Why he leaves every month for about a week and comes back looking dreadful, why he was terrified at the thought of going into DADA earlier, why he never gets close to anyone and let's them know his true feelings because well, I suppose if they ever found out he wouldn't want it used against him or his friends and why he was terrified of us seeing his scars those times.

Wait! No that can't be, can it? What if Re was the one I heard back in our first year?

It must've been, it was a full moon after all. I remember it being big, bright and had somewhat of a glow, drawing your eyes away from all of the stars. It must have been a bad one because of that, the screaming and the fact he was in the hospital wing for what felt like days on end. How could I have been so close and yet so far from many of the answers to my questions? What can I do to help in anyway? I love him. I am willing to do anything at this point. He has to know how I feel, even if he sees himself as a monster it would be impossible for me to do so. I mean he f*cking folds his socks and wears adorable, oversized jumpers!

After my shower I get into bed but not before checking up on Remus. "How are you after earlier?" I say in a murmur as he is trying and yet clearly failing to stay awake and read his book. He glances up at me sitting on the end of his bed "Never better, you?" I can see him cringing and shying away from his own words. "Look Re, how can I forget the whole reason we had to miss DADA earlier and what it was that caused the situation? Why would I even dream of getting you kicked out? You aren't meant to feel well after a panic attack or spilling your guts to someone but I just want to know that you feel better than you were and well you can trust me. I want you to remember that, along with the fact I love you." I barely whisper the last bit so the others don't hear. I didn't think even he had heard until I spot a strong blush covering his face as he continues to 'read'.

~Remus's POV~

Wow! He actually said the words I am so scared to repeat! He actually told ME that he loves me, ME!! Of all the pretty girls he has chasing after him he chooses probably the most ugly, scarred, tall and socially awkward boy in the castle. Literally everyone would have thought he would have at least picked one of Lily's friends Marlene. I must admit even to the gay part of myself she is hot. Don't get me wrong I am pleased that he has chosen me, it's just I would've slept better at night knowing that he can't be attacked for being gay, bi or whatever he is along with dating I messed up bisexual werewolf. I love him so much and I love the idea of him liking me back, this must be the most amazing dream ever! Although if it was a dream how can I still be so clumsy, a social disaster and a hideous monster? Oh no I am blushing again, oh and would you look at that he has noticed and is trying to contain his laughter. I delicately shove him off the end of my bed gaining a playful glare from him as he gets the hint and walks over to his own bed...

He lays down and faces my direction on his bed I can feel myself blushing again! I mean seriously? Oh no! Note to self again do N O T say seriously or anything similar in front of Sirius. How many times do I have to remind myself he doesn't shut up about it. Just as well I only thought it. Oh Ok he is staring at me blushing while clearly not reading. How am I supposed to concentrate after the conversation we just had? Ugh I give up I am going to sleep. I reluctantly put down my book and lay back down on my bed trying my hardest not to look in Sirius's direction. But I mean come on, he is on the side of me I find most comfortable sleeping on. I give in, trying to give in and close my hangings until the other boys are asleep when I finally hear James and Peters' heavy breathing and assume it is safe to turn over because it also sounds like Sirius is asleep as well but nooo. I turn over to see him staring at me dreamily. Why does he look so hot doing that? Come on Remus you just need to breath, close your eyes and just pretend he is not staring straight at you. Well this is great he is stifling a laugh, oh and would you look at that I am blushing, again! Ugh this is not fair why does he have this affect on me? I scrunch up my nose and turn over, why can't I just burry my feelings?

I eventually fall asleep...

I wake up earlier than normal. I sit up and look at all of the other boy's beds. I can make out the sleeping figures of James and Peter but I can't see Sirius. I look at my muggle clock my mum gave to me and find out it is 05:45 in the morning. Well I don't recon I can fall asleep again so I swing my legs off the bed and head to the bathroom. I get myself ready for the day, grab a book and head down to the common room.

When I get down there I spot Sirius staring into the freshly lit fire. I slowly walk up and sit in the sofa beside him and stare at it to. Letting myself be enchanted by the dancing flames getting lost in time. We got so lost that's we hadn't noticed the sun creeping further and further into the common room and I didn't even notice his head that was gently rested on me shoulder. We suddenly hear the first of many footsteps coming down the stairs in our direction, we spring apart with my book falling on the floor. We both go to get it, the whole cliched hand on hand while getting the dropped item happened. It is even better in real life! But oh no! People! People! I can't deal with people! The supposedly magical time in books when you stare into your crush's eyes is supposed to be perfect and long lasting but it got cut short by the sounds of people coming closer still. He passed me my book and started walking to the other side of the common room. No one could see us alone and close together incase they suspect romance between us. As much as I would love to be with him society won't allow it.

~Sirius's POV~

After Remus and I had spent the first hour or so of the morning staring into the fire until we were interrupted and had to scramble apart to get rid of suspicion of our feelings for each other in this unaccepting society. I would love to be with him especially now we know how each other feel but society... well let's just say aren't very accepting of change. My parents are a good example of that, knowing them they would find a punishment worse than death to 'put me straight' and correct my 'incorrect' feelings towards those of the same gender as me.

Snap out of it Sirius!

I thought as I slowly walked out of the portrait whole to the great hall for breakfast. There is no point in us trying to be together even in secret because if even one person found out they could make our lives hell and I can't do that to Re I must tell him we can't become anything more than friends from this day onwards.

When we have eaten breakfast we head towards transfiguration in which we have to pair up. Yet again James pairs with Pete. SERIOUSLY?! AGAIN?! It is like James is trying to kill me. I need time to prepare what I am going to say, time to be away from the boy of my dreams, who's heart I am going to have to break.

In transfiguration we had to work closely with our partners, great. Professor Mcgonagall was watching everyone very closely to make sure that they were actually participating and not just letting their partners do all of the work. This meant I couldn't spend my time with James and Pete, I actually had to be near him and his endearing nerdy traits. How am I meant to tell him after that?

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Heyyyyy so two updates in one day  I hope you like it! totally not me typing this out while listening to Sunshine as its being released-

As always please let me know if you spot any gramma or spelling errors so I can correct them and have a great day/night!