Xiaother crack

Marry me

"Zhongli and ...partner."
Xiao muttered in a low tone.
Zhongli and Childe patiently waiting at a table for the shorter male to continue.

"T-the traveler has been planning on asking for your approval in marriage."
Xiao stated, continuing, "I want you guys to give the traveler a fair amount of time."

Zhongli nodded his head, "I see, we will give the traveler a hard time. I promise,"

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While the blond stood at the door nervous Xiao acted oblivious on the side.
The door swings open, revealing Zhongli with his arms crossed. "Good evening my friend, what do I owe the pleasure to?"

Aether puffed his chest and started talking, "I'm asking for your son's hand in marriage."
The blond was a bit cocky, seeing that his reputation should be enough for Zhongli.

"No-"

"Wha-"
Xiao looked at Zhongli confused, eyebrows slightly raised. The ex-archon cleared his throat. "What makes you think you are a worthy competitor against Xiao's many other suitors."
Aether stood in shock, a hand raising.

"Xi-Xiao has other people?"

"Do you expect the mighty Yaksha to cook for you at home?"
Zhongli said in a stern tone.

"N-no, of course not! He'd follow me on adventures, across Teyvat probably."
Zhongli shook his head, Xiao was behind Aether shaking his head and making a cross sign with his arms.

Zhongli took this gesture as approval to keep going.
"Traveler, you go around with so many other people. You took Xiao on one date, you must only be infatuated with him to use him for your immoral desires!"
Zhongli's eyes glowed of geo while the traveler began to cower.

Childe ran to the door quickly and took over. Xiao was relieved to see him, making a thumbs up towards the ginger.

Childe took this as a gesture to keep doing what Zhongli was, "Woah traveler, you want to use Xiao as a little toy."
Childe snarled, Xiao wanted to die of embarrassment.

"I-I would never-"
Aether gasped in disbelief,
"Do you intend on adopting a child?"
Zhongli asked.

"Paimon counts as a child right?"
Aether responded,
"Do you have a job?"
Childe asked, raising a brow.
"I'm a full-time traveler."

"Can you cook?"
Zhongli interrupted.
"I'm the best of chiefs."
Aether said, brimming with happiness.

"I see, well that's all things we do not want for Xiao, you are dismissed." The blond froze, looking back at Xiao slowly before looking back at the scary pair.
Aether's bottom lip quivered and ran off into the distance. Childe and Zhongli gave each other a fist bump.
"We make good fake parents."
Childe snickered.

"No, that is quite the opposite. You needed to mess with him not reject him."
Xiao groaned, disappearing to go find the blond.
Childe and Zhongli shrugged and went inside the home.

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"Whaaa-"
Aether cried into the pillow, tears soaking in the piece of cotton. "Traveler, you did nothing wrong. Those two are just joking."
Xiao muttered, wrapping his hands around Aether's figure.

"Relax, you'll be fine."
Xiao whispered, pressing a light kiss on the blond's cheek.
The traveler sniffed, gripping Xiao's clothes for comfort.
"I love you."

"Okay"

"Say it back."
Xiao said calmly, "I love you too."
Aether muttered.

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"You have our permission, traveler."
Zhongli said, smiling softly. Childe gave a small grin and a thumbs up.

Aether didn't let go of Xiao, showing how he wouldn't take no for an answer in any way. "Mine."
"Yes you can have the emo yaksha."
Childe said, waving his hand dismissively.
Meanwhile, Paimon was raiding the kitchen.