*5*

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The party last night actually didn't go as bad as I expected. I made more guy friends than girlfriends because the majority of the girls that I spoke to were either clout chasers or just evidently toxic. I got the slightest bit closer to Vinnie, considering I've known him for a whole 24 hours, I met lilhuddy and Jxdn which was pretty amazing because I listen to their music a lot. I sort of didn't speak much tho because my inner school girl came out and made me feel like I was trying to talk to my crush which kinda sucked.

Vinnie addressed the rumours this morning after another picture of us at the party was posted on TikTok room but it doesn't really look like anyone really buys what he's saying but I couldn't care less, I can't say the same for him though. He seems like he feels really bad and I think it actually affects him more than it does me.

I'm currently on my way to the Hype House to speak to him about everything just because I feel like he needs to talk about it and I know he talks about this stuff to the other people in the house, he told me last night that he did, but I think he needs an outsiders perspective on everything, someone who is not influenced by social media at all.

The Uber pulled up to the house and the gates opened for me. When I got to the top of the driveway I saw Thomas holding a camera and Calvin standing outside the house doing something stupid.

"Who's that?" I Heard Calvin say. "Dude, you met her last night, you were just too high to remember"

"Is Vinnie home?" I asked. "Yeah, he's in his room" Thomas responded. I nodded, showing that I heard him and headed inside. Mia was the first to see me. "Hey, you here to see Vinnie?" she asked. "Yeah, where's his room?"

"I'll take you there, I was going up anyway," she said. We walked up a large staircase and down a few halls until we got to the end. "Vinnie! You have a guest," Mia announced as she walked into the room. I walked in behind and waved slightly. "I'll be done streaming soon," he said, turning back to his game.

Mia left and I sat on Vinnie's bed, his cat joining me seconds later. She was very cute and very cuddly, not like my cat back home. My cat only likes hugs from certain people at certain times, she's very fussy.

I opened Instagram, mindlessly scrolling through while I waited for Vinnie to finish up his stream. 20 minutes later he joined me, sitting on the bed next to me and his cat came and joined us. "She's very cute," I said as I admired the patterns covering her fur coat. "Her name is Hera," Vinnie said, kissing her on the forehead. "Hera Hacker, how cute," I smiled.

I've been contemplating asking Vinnie something all morning and I decided I would and headed straight here and now I think I might chicken out. It is a sort of personal question and I've only know Vinnie a day so I don't want to overstep but I really feel the need to ask the question. "Vinnie?" I piped up. "Yeah?" he diverted his attention from Hera to me. "Um, yesterday when Michael and Jordan were absolutely bewildered by the fact that I didn't know who you were," I started, mocking the two boys and earning a chuckle from Vinnie, "I noticed you kinda looked a little sad when you mentioned that it was nice meeting someone who didn't know who you were, if you don't mind me asking, I just want to know why?"

He sat up straight and faced the wall. I wasn't sure if I overstepped but then I noticed it looked like he was thinking. "Well, I think it's just 'cause I'm 19 now and your average 19-year-old doesn't usually have people whispering around them and people following them with cameras and shoving phones in their faces so it's nice to have a break and meet someone who doesn't know who you are, ya know? it's just refreshing." I get what he's saying and I do empathise with him, I really do, but he sort of avoided the question about how it made him feel and I just want him to feel as though he can talk about these things with me even though it's been a day. Everyone is probably thinking how I'm really trying to rush this relationship and push him into trusting me but that's not what I'm doing, I just like feeling trusted and I'm always here to help and I can't do that if you don't trust me. Do you see what I'm getting at?

"I didn't really answer your question," he said after a minute, "I think it just sort of upsets me that people see me as the guy on TikTok or the guy who streams or whatever platform they associate me with, they don't associate me with me and meeting people who don't know me from social media is like a breath of fresh air or a clean slate. They get to learn who I am through me and not through what they see on social media and they don't come into whatever sort of relationship it is we have, with some preformed perception of who I am, if that makes sense"

"Yeah, that makes perfect sense. I just kind of feel bad for anyone who is well known because people will almost always have a preformed idea about you because of what they see about you on the internet but that could be completely different to what you're like in real life. Like, yesterday I was like oh this guy's nice and he seems like a nice person he's just got this toxic, bad boy type look to him but then when I was on your TikTok I was like, oh, this guy looks like a toxic asshole. I got two different vibes from in-person you and online you and I bet there are some people who think the online version of you is the real you but it's just snippets of you... I think half of that didn't make sense"

"No, I get what you're saying that's exactly what I mean. But I'm just glad you saw the in-person me before the online me, not gonna lie he's kind of an asshole," Vinnie said, causing us both to burst out laughing.

I really think that Vinnie and I are building a strong connection and I hope it continues to be like this, I don't want any drama to arise... other than the fake stuff online, that's inevitable.

a/n

It's holidays for me so I expected to be writing a lot during the holidays but I really haven't but that's ok because I have the next twenty chapters already written lol

hope you guys are liking the story so far 

word count: 1138

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