Up Where We Belong

Chapter 43

Flight

My whole Tuesday was bombarded with long-hour meetings and telephone calls. I felt so tired after leaving the office. I wanted to eat pizza, again. But thinking I might see him when I go to that pizza house we used to go to made me order online to be delivered home. As I stepped inside the house, Mom told me that Gab went to see me, again, but he left immediately because he still had a class to attend.

The first time he looked for me was on Sunday afternoon but Mommy didn't know where I went so she couldn't tell him my whereabouts. She said he wanted to talk to me about something. Kinailangan niya pang pumunta dito dahil hindi raw niya ako matawagan.

I know I shouldn't avoid him but I couldn't help but hide from him. I know his purpose in meeting me is to talk about it which I clearly don't want to hear yet.

Nagkita kami ng mga friends ko to celebrate Klea's another big achievement at work.

I'm good at acting fine but my friends don't believe that. I know. I just feel lucky that I have friends who are careful with their words and don't make silly jokes about what I'm going through.

Hindi ko naman sila tinanong sa mga nangyari matapos ang paghiwalay namin sa bar. I feel that they're not yet ready to open up to the group about their affairs, so I just played like I didn't know anything at all.

Si Ram ay tahimik rin. I wanted to ask him about Sierra and what happened after that night, but he just kept sharing about another job offer he received. Nakatakda na naman siyang aalis. Well, he seems like he's enjoying and I'm happy for him. Si Camille naman ay babalik din ng Hong Kong. Rosie, like her usual self, prefers to stay in the country despite tons of job offers to work abroad. She's contented and happy with her job, too. She'd just rather spend her vacation in a foreign country than actually work there.

Wednesday came and I packed my things for my trip to Cebu. I decided to stay there for a little while after the summit. Tatlong araw ang summit at Linggo dapat ang uwi ko. Muntik ko nang makalimutan ang tungkol sa kasal, binyag at birthday sa pamilya ni Aldrin at Fatima. I'm happy for them, truly. Anyone would really ask if I can be a sport with it and I already expect that several people would never believe me.

But as much as I wanted to be there to share their joy, I already made up my mind to rather spend that day alone in a land where nobody knows me.

Kailangan ko ng ilang araw lang para makapagpahinga ang utak ko at ang buong katawan ko.

Maaga ang flight ko kaya maaga rin akong natulog dahil nga pagod din naman ako galing sa trabaho.

4:00 AM ay tumulak na akong airport para sa 6 o'clock na flight. It wasn't a surprise anymore that we got stuck in the traffic even at an early morning hour. The drive took us one hour, and luckily I arrived just in time.

The man next to me helped me in putting my suitcase up in the overhead bin. He smiled as I said 'thank you' and proceeded to the back. So, I guess I'll be sitting here alone as I wanted.

Umupo na ako malapit sa bintana. Ilang beses na akong nakasakay ng eroplano but like a child, I still feel excited in every flight. I would always choose the seat near the window so I could see the clouds and everything down there from above.

Wala na halos pumapasok na mga pasahero and any minute there would be an announcement from the crew and the captain so I just closed my eyes, waiting for the take-off.

It didn't even take a minute before I felt someone sit beside me. Nanlamig ako at pinanuyuan ng lalamunan nang minulat ko ang mga mata at napagtanto kung sino iyon.

My heart skipped a beat. Magkahalong takot at sabik ang nararamdaman ko. Nanginig ng sobra ang mga labi ko at hindi ko maapuhap ang sasabihin.

Pre-flight announcements followed but my attention was already divided. Sinikap kong pakalmahin ang pagdagsaan ng kakaibang pakiramdam sa tiyan ko. I feel like I'm going to throw up. My anxiety is growing and this manifests in my body.