Wounded Hearts

Chapter 5

Buong gabi nag-echo sa utak ko ang sinabi ni Sofia sa'kin at ang paghingi niya ng pabor kaya hindi rin ako nakatulog. So I didn't just stayed up late for nothing.

I spend my midnight doing my part in our research. Finding local studies and literature related to our research topic is really hard. Indeed, there's a scarcity of local literatures in this country. At kung mayroon naman ay masyado na itong outdated.

So this is college, we can complain all we want but at the end of the day, we still find ourselves doing it.

Para akong zombie na naglalakad sa hallway. Nakatulala habang naglalakad. Mabuti na lamang at Friday ngayon, hindi gaanong mabigat ang subject.

Pag-upo ka sa aking upuan ay tila wala pa rin ako sa katinuan. Naghalo-halong antok at stress ang nararamdaman ko. Hindi ko rin namalayan na nagsimula na pala ang discussion ng aming propesor.

"Class, in Gestalt Therapy, there is a technique called the Empty Chair technique. It's a role play exercise wherein there is an empty chair beside the client. Now, anong gagawin sa empty chair na iyon?

The client will imagine that chair as someone they want to talk to or it can also be the other parts of themselves. The client will have a dialogue to that empty chair. This technique will help clients become more aware of their emotions, or can even resurface repressed feelings."

Everyone is attentively listening to the professor. I can say that this class really love this subject, Introduction to Counseling.

"So let's have an exercise here. Class, I want you all to think of your experiences which you have "unfinished business". I discussed while ago that unfinished business can be manifested in unexpressed feelings or those repressed feelings. These unacknowledged feelings create emotional debris na kung saan dahil nga hindi ina-acknowledge ng tao itong emotions na ito and through repressing, the client didn't fully experienced it so nagkakaroon ito ng disturbances sa present situation. This unfinished business seeks to be completed. In what way?"

Nagtaas naman ng kamay si Kristen.

"I believe that we can only finish this unfinished business if we just let ourselves experience this feeling, fully. For instance, if we feel stressed or sad, we should just let ourselves experience this sadness, this stress. I think in that way, embracing what is really happening to you, we can resolve it immediately. Walang repression na mangyayari at agad natin itong nareresolve. Same in having unfinished business with someone. Like those relationship that just ended up with closure or a person you hold a grudge with kaya di mo kayang harapin. As what is says, unfinished business will persist until the person chooses to face and deal with those unexpressed feelings. Closure is important"

Unfinished business. Saan ko nga ba ito narinig?

"You are right there, Ms. Ignacio. Remember Freud, may sinabi siya about unexpressed emotions. Anyone here who can recall it?"

Agad rin naman akong nagtaas ng kamay.

"Go ahead Ms. Villescas"

"Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.

Freud suggests that we won't get rid of our negative feelings or emotions by repressing it, rather, it will continue to affect us more and can manifest through negative ways if we won't choose to face it"

And I realized something about what I said. It's funny to think that we are studying this kind of topic yet, I can't seem to apply it to myself.

"Yes, that's it. Walang magandang dulot ang pag-repress natin sa mga emotions or situations na hindi natin gustong harapin. You know class, para tayong mga empty bottle. The more na nag-iipon tayo ng mga hinanakit, grudges and unacknowledged feelings, mas mabilis tayong mapupuno. And what will happen kapag masyado ng nag-pile up itong mga emotions na'to? Sasabog tayo"