Only Sleeping ✔️

Chapter 13 | Will

New chapter!
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It's absolutely wild and I just get so excited to post new chapters and connect with my readers. I simply cannot wait until Only Sleeping is completed because I am so incredibly excited to share more of my work with you!! 🤍

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Mason has been avoiding me for the past two days. I don't see him at school, he skips third period and he's been driving himself every morning. Despite finding him and his motorcycle incredibly hot I can't help the way knowing he's riding it to avoid me dampening my mood when I see it. I sleep alone for what feels like the first time in forever and I don't even know if I can say I'm sleeping alone because the sleep I get is broken and nowhere near as satisfying as the sleep I get with Mason. As much as I hate to admit it I was getting used to having him in my bed and I'm more disappointed than I'd care to say.

Jenna however, notices and very quickly gets it out of me.

"Mason stopped coming over" 

She lifts a brow "Why?"

 I shrug "He just doesn't...I find it hard to uh.." 

I shake my head my stomach rolling, no way I'm admitting to Jenna I can't sleep without him, but she doesn't need me to.

Her eyes roll "I already know your sleep is shit, the bags under your eyes and the extra shot of expresso you've been ordering kind of gives it away"

 I wince, I know I look like shit. It's hard not to notice when I look in the mirror every day and see how much more noticeable the dark circles under my eyes are.

Jenna sighs "Didn't Kade stop by the other day?" 

I nod not really looking at her instead watching the birds and focusing on the feeling of the cool bleachers touching my back as I lay down. I don't want to talk about Kade. What difference does it make if Kade stopped by? He's not Mason. Nonetheless not wanting to sound even more pathetic I let her talk. 

She groans aware I'm not all in this conversation "So? He likes you"

I scoff "He likes me sure, but it's not like he's looking for a boyfriend. He just wants to fuck"

Jenna shakes her head "So what? Neither is Mason" 

I wince at that wishing it didn't hurt as much as it did to hear. I would have rather her not said it. I don't want to think about him, and definitely about him fucking because the few whispers I've overheard in the hallway have been enough to confirm he hasn't been in my bed, but he'd been in some others. I suck in a breath before mumbling my next words.

 "What if..what if I love him?" 

So much for sounding pathetic I guess because that just slipped out. I let the question hang and even Jenna doesn't fill the silence for a moment.

"You don't." She pauses "Do you?" 

I bite my lip not daring to look away from the clouds. Not wanting to face her when I admit it. 

"I wish I didn't" 

She starts tapping her fingers on the bleachers next to her. Leave it to Jenna to try and troubleshoot any problem. Even one as uncontrollable as love. 

 "Well...you'll get over him eventually right?"

I chuckle humourlessly "I don't..maybe I don't want to" 

I'm not sure when I became this honest or when I decided Jenna was facilitating a therapy session, but these confessions keep slipping out. I might as well call her father.