Daddy Issues

34| Mom

I get in from work to my phone ringing. I rang Phoebe before I left for work, what could they possibly want.

"Hello." I answer and they let out a deep breath. "Josh? Phoebe?" I ask but there wasn't an answer. "Alex?" I ask and they let put another deep breath.

"Sweetie it's me." My mom's voice says and I immediately get a sick feeling. She still can't say my name. "Hi." I say awkwardly.

"I'm so sorry." She starts and I nod. "None of this is your fault. It's his fault, always will be. It's just..." she takes another deep breath. "I'm so sorry. I don't think you understand how sorry I am. I was incredibly selfish. I never meant to ruin your birthday." She says and I nod and bite my tongue.

"India." She chokes and it sounds as though she's crying. "Im so sorry." She cries and I nod. "I know." I surprise myself by saying. I should be angry at her. But she's my mom and I can't be.

"Do you forgive me?" She asks and I nod. "I do. But I am sorry I made you reach breaking point." I say and she lets out a deep cry that pulls on my heartstrings.

"You didn't." She cries and I put a hand over my chest. "It isn't your fault India. It's his fault. He's a selfish man but I still love him so much and that isn't your fault. I need to let him go. I needed to leave him and you gave me that courage." She says and I nod.

"I know, I'm proud of you." I say and she sighs.

"I'm coming home next week. Will that be okay with you?" She asks. "Yes of course it will." I say smiling.

"I've been speaking to Lucy." She says and I mentally groan. "She says Alex has practically been living with you." She says and I can already see the grin.

"We've been hanging out quite often yeah." I say. "Do you like him?" She asks and I groan which makes her laugh. "You do." She says and I nod. "It's really complicated." I say and she smiles.

"I'm gonna have to go, but I can't wait to hear about it when I get back." She says and I smile. "I love you India." She says and I suck in a breath. "I love you too." I say and end the call just as the front door opens.

"Alex?" I ask putting the phone down. "Yeah and No." Hunter calls and I walk into the hall to see Hunter practically holding Alex up.

Alex was struggling to stand and his nose was pumping out blood, followed with a red ring around his eyes.

"Oh my god. What happened?" I ask guiding them into the kitchen. "He was in a fight." Hunter says sitting him on a stool. "I can see that." I say examining his face.

"He deserved it." Alex grits and I sigh and ask Hunter to grab me some things.

"Im sorry." He apologises and I rise an eyebrow. "If I go home my mom will freak out and I just want to be with you." He says and I nod.

He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me closer to him.

"Thanks." I say to Hunter and take a step back from Alex to start cleaning his cuts.

I catch Alex's eyes a few times as he watches me intently clean up his face.

I officially have whiplash. I can't keep this up. I've actually fallen for him. I really like him and he doesn't want the same end game as me. I have to stop this.

"So who'd you fight with?" I ask whilst cleaning his knuckles. "Jason." Hunter says as I walk to get an ice pack. I end up getting two.

"Hold this on your knuckles and I'll hold his on your eye." I say and he does exactly that.

"Why'd you fight him?" I ask and Alex scoffs. "I don't know if you can call it a fight." He says and I raise an eyebrow.

I turn to Hunter and he just sighs. "Alex punched him a few times and then Jason's other mates basically beat the crap out of Alex. There was like 3 of them on him." He says and I wince.

"I'm fine." Alex confirms and I roll my eyes. "Say that to your broken nose." I say and they look at me shocked. "It's broken?" He asks and I shrug. "Probably. I'm not a doctor you know." I say and he nods.

"I'm staying here tonight, you can head home." Alex says and Hunter nods. "I'll see you at school." He says to us and leaves.

I take the ice pack away from his knuckles and throw it onto the counter.  Alex copies my actions and pulls me into him by my hips.

He plants his lips against mine before letting his hands wonder under my top, making me shiver.

"Alex." I whimper as his cold hands get to my boobs.

"Have you recovered?" He whispers against my lips. I can't do this.

"Alex. I can't." I say and he raises an eyebrow. "Do whatever the hell we're doing anymore." I add. "India." He starts but I shake my head no.

"You're welcome to stay if you don't want to go home but I can't do this anymore. I'm confused and my mom just rang me and I... I think I just need to go to sleep." I say heading upstairs and ignoring him calling after me.

I get into my pyjamas and into bed. I wrap myself in my blanket and lie down.

The door creaks open and I look up at Alex. "I won't touch you, or kiss you or whatever but can I sleep beside you?" He asks and I nod. I move over some for him to climb in beside me.

"You said your mom called." He says lying on his side to face me. I just nod and he goes to reach forward but quickly returns his hand to his side.

"Did everything go okay?" He asks and I nod. "She couldn't stop apologising. I felt bad." I say and he nods slowly.

"Did you forgive her?" He asks and I nod again. "She's my mom, I know she was sorry." I say and get the urge to get as close to him as possible.

I turn on my back and just sigh. This is shit. I want him and he's right there. But I can't carry on the way we're going, I just can't.

He'll ruin me. He knows it. I know it. I think I've always known it.