Destiny

五

"Namjoon-ssi..." I said in almost a whispering voice when he was sitting on the ground writing something with the brush. "Yes..." He said still focused on his paper and brush. "You... You write?" It came out as a stutter. I'm sorry but I can't help but stutter around him. He makes me nervous. "I wrote those novels." He said signing with his head while his eyes were still focused on his paper. My eyes almost came out of my socket when I saw thick and thicker books arranged in the shelf. They were red, blue, green. Every colour. "1... 2... 3..." I started. "37" I turned around when I felt someone standing behind me. I looked into his eyes and he looked at me with a poker face. "I wrote 37 books." He said as he started collecting some more papers from the shelf. I nodded and looked at the books again. "7 Bullets" I read one of the book's name which had a vivid colour from other books. While other books had this soft and bright colours, this book was rather darker shade of... Purple. "What is this book about?" I pointed at the book but never got any reply. I sighed and sat on my mattress looking at the moon and the moonchild who was shining in its light. Namjoon-ssi. He was busy writing when I don't know I slept.

"It's about 7 guys from different places, different family, different names, different identities who shares the same dream and rules the world."

"Good Morning Eomma." I, from the kitchen heard Namjoon-ssi greeting his mother. "Good Morning My son... Aigoo... Did you wished your wife? She has been up for a while." I heard some sound, which I predicted is of his mother patting Namjoon-ssi on his cheeks. "I didn't get to see her in the morning Eomma." He said, truth. He never lies, he is never disrespectful to anyone whether a man or a woman. But... Why can't he talk to me... The way he talks to his mother. C'mon Y/N you are thinking so much... Be thankful that you were not married to an almost deceasing old man or some disrespectful brat, atleast he respects you and never says anything which could hurt you... But... Still... Him not talking to me normally hurts me. Woah... Look at her... She got so much of a good husband and she is so selfish that she is demanding for me.

I shook my head harshly who stop two of my souls, the angel and the devil, to stop talking to themselves. "Are you feeling sick?" I heard the familiar feel voice. I turned to look at him and he was looking at me with a poker face. I soon looked at the pot I was cooking in, in order to not to look at him directly into his eyes. He is still a man, and is superior... It is disrespectful to do so. "Eomma told me that you were up from a very early morning so I should wish you a Good Morning. Good Morning Kim Y/N." He said and I just can't contain my smile but still had to hide it under a poker face. I nodded my head in agreement and there was silence for a while.

And then I broke it. "Namjoon-ssi, I cooked-" when I turned my head to the direction I saw him earlier, he wasn't there. I came out of the kitchen while wiping my hands from the piece of cloth. "Namjoon-ssi?" I called his name again and again in a soft voice. "He left dear, he had a meeting with other Generals." His mother said and sipped her tea which I made for her earlier. I nodded my head and started approaching the kitchen. I don't know why I felt my hear falling into the pit of my stomach. Everything he does is just because his mother tells him to. He never talks to me first until I makes an effort. I let out a sigh as I felt my palm getting weaker and my heart getting heavier. "Y/N dear." I halted my steps at the spot and turn around towards his mother with a smile. "Why do you still call him Namjoon-ssi?" I looked at her in shock and then looked at my intertwined hands. What should I call him then? "Because he is 4 years older than me, I should use formalities right?" "I and Namjoon's Appa have 8 year gap. Did you ever heard me calling him with formalities?" I shook my head slowly. "Then call him Namjoon from now on and if he says something tell him that I told you to." She said as I nodded my head hesitantly. He would never ever have said anything even if I would have called him without formalities from the day 1.

"I'm home." I heard him as I ran towards the door, hiding behind the pole, just looking at him now brightens my day. The way he smiles at his mother and other working ladies, the way he talks, his voice, the way he is so mature. When would I see the same smile for me on his face? "Y/N dear, come over here. You don't have to hide there. We are your family as well." His mother extended her hands and I felt Namjoon-ssi's gaze on me. His smiling face was now replaced with poker one. Why only me. "Namjoon, from now on Y/N will call you Namjoon not Namjoon-ssi." She said patting the head of his son, how in the world the whole Kim Family is so tall when I feel like a dwarf here. "I never had a problem with whatever she calls me." He said and passed a smile at his mother and entered the house. Without even giving me a glance he went up to the stairs probably to freshen up and change into his comfort clothes. I sighed again and looked at the direction he went. "Don't worry dear, he takes time to open up to strangers." His mother patted my back and smiled reassuringly. I nodded my head and looked at the direction again. But he doesn't seems like that to other villagers whom he helps. And... How much more time he'll take to understand that I'm not an stranger anymore, that I'm the companion of his life... It's already been 4 weeks.

I wake up for the nth time in the night, only to scratch the part that dork mosquito bit me at. "I hate everything about summers." I mumbled under my breath and then saw a mosquito flying straight infront of my face. Without thinking twice I clapped the mosquito dead. "That's what you get for biting me." Saying so I lied down into the blanket once again. "I hate summers." I hissed and kicked the blankets out of my legs only for the mosquitoes to sit there. "What do they get after drinking my blood?" I scratched the part again and mumbled not enough for Namjoon-ssi to hear. But I guess it was so loud- From the corner of my eyes, I saw him getting up from his place and going out of the room. Did I disturbed him? Is he mad now? Why am I so problematic? I should have slept quietly, he was sleeping as well... It's not like mosquitoes are only biting me.

I was looking out lf the door he went out for almost 20 minutes now but no sign of him. I was about to sleep when he entered in the room with something out of which smoke was coming out. As soon as the smoke filled the air of the room, the room was filled with pleasant flowery smell. "What's that?" I asked but without even replying me he went to his study table to place the thing. Not expecting a reply from him, I started gathering my hairs. After securing them in a bun, I looked at Namjoon taking his pillow and blanket from his place. "I'm so sorry if I disturbed you Namjoon-ssi... You can sleep here... I know I'm kind of problematic. I'll go sleep downstairs-" I was interrupted by Namjoon-ssi now. "You can switch sides of you want to. There is breeze blowing outside and sleeping beside window won't cause you to feel warm. I attached mosquito repellent there." He said pointing towards the smoke thing and stood up straight. Not declining this good offer, I nodded my head, happily taking my pillow and blanket to the other side. "Thank You Namjoon-ssi." "Namjoon." He correct me and I poked my tongues out at my mistake. "Sorry." He nodded at my apology and laid down on my mattress. I did the same but as soon as turned to the side, I can smell something, the fragrance which is so strange yet so familiar. Pressuring my peanut size brain, I finally got to know where this smell comes from. Namjoon-ssi's clothes. Whenever I wash them, despite how much I get scolded for doing so by his mother, they smells like this. "This is how you smells like." I said and tucked my nose in the mattress. This is how it would feel if I lie close to him, if I cuddle- I lightly kicked my legs in the air and started chewing on the pillow with a blush. Wait... If I can smell him through his mattress does that mean- he could smell me through mine? No!!!! It must be smelling like sweat. I closed my eyes tightly in the embarrassment of how I would be smelling. But he wouldn't smell me right? I peeked to my right to see the position he is sleeping in and luckily he was facing the ceiling with one of his arm over his head and another on his stomach.

I let out a silent sigh of relief and turned my body wholely towards him to face him. His face glowing in the moonlight. His plump lips, his dragon eyes. His face looked so peaceful while was sleeping, as if there is an angel. The white hanbok blending with his skintone perfectly, his long hair brushing through his forehead and without even knowing, I drifted into sleep while admiring him.

"So this is how you smells like." He turned to his side to face the peaceful girl sleeping beside him.