Destiny

十四

"What is this?" He pointed at the lunchbox as he looked at me. "Lunchbox?" I said not sparing a glance at him. "And for what?" His question was genuine. Ever since the start of epidemic, I stopped giving him lunchboxes since it can get contaminated and I don't even know if it is really clean out there where he goes to work. "It's getting late we have to go." I said ignoring the questionnaire. "We?" He was getting even more confused. "I'm going to accompany you to the work." I picked up the box from the kitchen and stood up straight. I looked at him with a eye smile and tilted my head. "I won't take you out there." He said as he turned around to leave. Running behind him, I held him by his wrist, asking, "why?" There was a moment of silence when I observed him looking at my hand, I backed it off from his wrist, "sorry." I said and smiled foolishly. After another moment of awkward silence, he smiled warmly at me and looked down, only to look back at me.

Taking me right hand in both of his large palms, he said, "The condition out there is not favourable and I know, you know about it." He said as his hand travelled to my cheeks. I looked down with a pout. "Don't feel bad, it's not like I'm not taking you because I don't want to." He said as he tucked some strands of my hair to my ears. "Does that mean you want to take me?" I smiled brightly at him and almost jumped on him. "Its not like that." He defended himself. "You don't want to take me?" I pouted again. "I-" but before he could speak anything, I cut him off in between. "I knew, you must have alot of mistresses out there, and you are hiding them from me." I turned around to go and sit in the leaving room, only to blackmail him even more. "Are they that pretty that you are feeling shameful to take me with you? Or did you tell everyone else out there that one of them is you wife?" I said almost loudly for him to hear it. After a while I heard him coming into the living room. He sat down beside me on the cushion. "Look at me." He said in a deep voice making my heart skip a beat or two. But seeing that I'm not listening to whatever he is saying, he turned my cushion around and dragged me towards himself under a matter of nano second. I was so shocked that I bet my hair would be standing like that of an angry cat. He was looking at me deeply as he held my face by my jaw. "I never knew you have such a pretty eyes." He said making me melt into him even more. All I could do in response was to look at him with gaped mouth, I bet I looked like a koala. Again taking my hands in his, he said, "You don't believe me?" His words sent me in utter shock. The extreme flow of guilt started raising up in my heart. "I promised that except for you, no one will get my attention, my respect and... my Love." "Namjoon I-" "Shh... Let me talk for now. Being an unexpressive person, I know I'm the reason you have having such thoughts." "I was just-" "Y/N, I told you please listen to me." He said making me nod. "Other women out there, I promise even if I talk to many of them, not because I want to but because it's my job to. I want to look after villagers and in some houses there are women who looks after everything, in royal court, there are women who I have to talk to to get the information. I promise never in my life I ever saw him with wrong intention, or if I liked them. Before marriage they were just my colleagues and the people I have the duty to look after. After marriage they are still the same for me. After marriage the only thing that changed to me was you, your responsibility and the feelings I have for you. There is no other lady for me. I go to work and I come back. There is nothing in between that. If you want to ask something, something that might have made you suspicious about me to think like that you may ask." He explained and while he was I was just looking at his and my hands. "Namjoon." I said as my eyes filled till the brim with tears, I was feeling bad for blackmailing him for my own happiness. "Hmm?" He said warmly, trying to look at my face which was hung down. "I'm sorry." I said as a drop or two of tears fell from my eyes. "Why are you crying?" He asked as he took away his hand and sat side by side, keeping my head on his chest, he held me by my shoulders slightly rubbing up and down. "You were not at wrong, you know? It's all fine for someone to get suspicious of their partner if they don't give you much attention. But what matters the most is clearing things out in the end. And you, you can tell me if you have any doubt, any suspicion over me. Without getting angry I'll explain everything, when I'm at the wrong you can slap me, I won't flinch. You can curse at me, you can do anything but don't leave me that's what I want. I may not be able to show it but you mean alot to me." Hearing him confessing such things made me cry even more. I snuggled closer to him as I sobbed on his chest while his hands were busy comforting me by rubbing my back. "You are a man, I could never hit you. You can hit me instead whenever the dumb me start being suspicious of me." "I can never ever hit you. Moreover, even if I am a man, that doesn't mean that I couldn't do mistakes, I can never be at wrong." He said as he kept his chin on my head. "I'm sorry " "Enough of it, I already told you, you were not at wrong." "It's getting late." I said as I sat up and wiped my tears. "Oh yeah, I almost forgot about the time." He said and looked out of ye window only to see the sun on the top of our head. "Don't cry." He said as he held my face into his arms wiping the tears off with his thumbs. I nodded my head in response. "Let's go." He said as he held me by my wrist. "To where?" I looked at him being completely puzzled about what is he talking about. "You wanted to accompany me, let's go." He said and pulled me up making me stand on my feet. "I was just-" "no more explaination, we don't have time for them anymore." He pulled me slightly again. "But the lunch-" "We'll be so busy to eat that, we can have this after we come back home in the evening." He somehow successfully pulled me out of the house as he locked the door.