TALO
"Kuya!" I excitedly shouted at them. I hugged so tight its a hug like the end of the world.
Na hug ko naman na kanina sila pero gusto ko pa ng mas matagal.
Iba talaga 'yung feeling na hindi lang sa mga salita nila naipapakita ang pagmamahal kundi pati na rin sa kanilang gawa.
Both of them are like my rope. Whenever im feeling down they pull my rope that causes me to boost or go up, continuing my unfinished road.
Sila lang naman 'yung kinakapitan ko. Baka kung wala sila ngayon sa tabi ko malamang wala na rin ako.
I can't handle my own feelings. It sucks! Even my doings, I can't control them, like if I want to hurt myself I'll just get a blade and cut my wrist like a paper as easy as that.
I realized that I shouldn't do that because it leave marks at my wrist and it's so embarrassing to see. I always use scrunchies to cover it.
If I can't be happy at all then why don't I end me? Why don't, just die?
Suicidal. I have encounter that once. Encounter in myself, not from anybody.
It was last year. I actually did hang myself, hindi ako makagalaw. As long as I'm hanged I'm getting numb-er and numb-er.
"Are you okay na? We can go home kung gusto mo." Kuya Eli. " I know you feel boring here." You're probably right Kuya. Alam na alam mo na ako ha. Detective?
Actually Kuya, kanina ko pa gustong umuwi kaso nga lang baka hindi pa pwede. The doctor might test me more or something.
"If I could stay here in this boring room and my families are with me, I am willing to be here forever." I smiled. I can't help to be emotional.
'Yung feeling na, akala mo walang nagmamahal sayo. 'Yung feeling na hindi ka mahalaga. 'Yung feeling na saka ka nalang mapapansin kapag may hindi magandang nangyari.
If staying here in the ospital can make me close to my family then I would, I would stay here and be close to my family for the rest of my life.
"Even if you are from afar, you'll always here at our hearts." Kuya Yvone held my hand and put it at his chest. I can feel his heartbeat. Its loud. Nervous, huh? Don't worry too much Kuya I won't do suicidal anymore
'Wag kang mag-alala, Kuya. I won't die. Im just making all of you stressed. Haha.
"I'm dying." I said. I badly want to laugh pero pinipigilan ko.
Hindi ako sang-ayon na mamatay ako. Marami pa 'kong pangarap sa buhay. Nag-jojoke lang talaga ako.
"Ash. No. Its not funny if you're joking." Kuya Eli said. Ba't ba alam na alam niya ang nagsisinungaling at nagsasabi ng totoo?
Detective 'yan?
"Kuya, I realized this pass few weeks I'm getting weaker and weaker." I pouted. "S-should I just sleep?" I asked.
Tatawa na talaga ako sa pag-eemote ko dito. Pero hindi. Strong ako 'no. Hindi ako bibigay. I turned and avoid their gaze para hindi nila ako makitang ngumisi.
"Alam mo? Pagod lang iyan e. Pagod ka lang. Pahinga ka lang bangon ka na ulit. May iba ka pang makakalaban maliban sa kinakalaban mo ngayon. Basta tandaan mo lang, kung talagang hindi mo na kaya, lumapit ka lang saamin ni Kuya Eli, sabay sabay nating solusyonan 'yan. We're trio. Remember our promises when you were seven?" Kuya Yvone's word are so good to my ears. Its like a medicine. Medicine of all the pain. Pain that almost want me to end my life.
"You're still seven when we promised to each other na walang iwanan. We promised na sama-sama tayong susulosyun ang mga problema natin." Kuya Eli said. "You ain't a weak woman. You are strong, We are." Kuya Eli.
Napaka-cute 'nung pagkakapronounce nila in tagalog parang may sariling accent. They are not even pronouncing the letter 'R' properly. Haha cutie.
Hindi naman talaga kami nag-tatagalog kasi before. I was born in Canada. In short I was an American citizen. We are not fluent in English. But then we started talking in Filipino language since we came here. We do, actually speak in Filipino when we're talking to out grandparents, but not that fluent.
They call us 'Conyo'. I kinda irritated with that. Kasi I don't know the meaning.
I was 11 years old when we came here. It was summer in Phillipines when we came. In the whole summer we started to learn Filipino language where our relatives are fluent.
We do understand Filipino language but not able to speak it. But now 3 years in the Philippines, we learned it. I actually love speaking in this language, it widen our vocabulary.
" I think you should rest, rest na tulog a, baka ibang rest ang gawin mo. You're thinking too much na naman. Stop overthinking na kase." Kuya Yvone sighed...
"Sabi ko 'kay Vince na hindi ka pa pwede mag-boyfriend ngayon. I told him to wait for you till you turn 18." Kuya Eli said. "We need more time to spend with you. You're still our baby girl. You're just 14, Ash. 4 years to go." He said and smirked.
Apat?! Apat na taon?! Paano siya makaka-paghintay ng ganoon ka-tagal? Baka bumigay siya? Its okay for me kung hindi siya makapag-hintay pero sana naman Vince maghintay ka.
Gusto rin kita kaya maghintay ka. Our feelings are mutual. 'Wag mo naman sana akong itaboy.
"Wala ba talagang cure itong sakit ko? Forever ba akong madadala dito sa hospital? Should I stay here forever? Pa'no na kayo makakapag-trabaho niyan, kung binabantayan niyo ako?" I asked them. I changed the topic. I don't want that, for now.
Nagkatinginan pa sila tila 'di nila alam ang sasabihin or they are just avoiding those questions. There is nothing wrong with those.
"I... I don't know." Kuya Yvone said while avoiding eye contacts with me. He is not sure with his answer nor he is don't know what he would answer.
"You can cure it your own. You just need to relax. Be happy. Enjoy. And Love." Si Kuya Eli.
And love. And love. And love...
Pagkatapos ng mahabang katahimikan. Napagpasyahan kong mapag-isa nalang muna. Nakatulog ata ako dahil sa boring.
I slept tight. A peaceful sleep.
Nagising na lamang ako nang may nagbukas sa door ng room.
Kinusot-kusot ko pa ang mata ko bago ko nakita kung sino 'yung pumasok.
It was Vince. Napakunot ang noo ko nang umamba siyang lumabas.
Is he avoiding me? Shit! 'Wag!
No, please. Im falling for you pero wala akong balak umamin. Bahala ka.
"Wait!" I shouted.
"Sorry, nagising kita. Tulog ka na ulit di na kita iistorbohin." And he smiled at me. Cute ng dimples niya, Shit!
"I need someone to talk to." I said. Wala na akong maisip na palusot kaya eto nalang.
Di naman niya ata mahahalata diba? Magaling kaya ako mag-acting.
"Tatawagin ko nalang 'yung mga Kuya mo." He said.
Aba'y ang isang ito hindi natitinag. Pukpukin kita diyan e.
"I-i want you." I said... Shit! Baka iba yung isipin niya. "I-i mean gusto ko na ikaw ang makakausap ko. Don't think too much." I left my gaze at him. It felt awkward as he stared at me intently.
"Wala naman talaga akong pake kung ano 'yung mga iniisip ko ang sa akin lang ay yung feelings mo." He winked and came closer to the chair beside me. "Ano pag-uusapan natin Attorney? Ok na ba yung mga ebidensya sa kaso?" He said.
I laughed at it. He really think I can be an Attorney. At least I have someone who trust me, right?
"Talo." I said and pouted.
"Paano ba kasi manalo sa puso mo?" He smirked.
YOU ARE READING
You Are My Home
Romance‼️ONGOING‼️ They are both each other's home. Home where you can find your own peace. A home where you can relax. A home that matters to us the most. A home where you are surely protected. A home that's simply yours. A home that gives sense of securi...
