Completely Different (ONE DIRECTION)

Chapter 3

UP ABOVE IS THE COLLAGED ORIGINAL PHOTO OF SHE'S DIFFERENT BOOK COVER! YEY!! BTW IM THINKING OF A ZERRIE FAN FIC SINCE I CAN'T GET OVER PERRIE AND ZAYN'S CHEMISTRY AND HIGH NOTES. SRSLY THEY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER.

COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ||•c 3
KIM's POV

I laid on my stomach and fuzzled with my phone. I can't get enough of twitter, the persons tweeting me are hillarious. They are making rumours and other stuffs.

"Hey?" Louis spoke but I ignore him and keep my distance. I feel the weight of the bed fall down for a second and I immediately know that he sat down the edge.

I rolled my eyes and refreshed my newsfeeds. No new tweet so I went to my profile and checked how many account I am following.

Oh great, only Harry.

I went to Harry's profile. He has over 24 Million followers no while I have.. 200k?  I turned to his following since it's not as much as his followers.

Ooh, Ed Sheeran! I have to follow him.

"Kim, I know you're upset," Louis says and I ignore him once more. I don't to errupt like a fucking volcano now. I am tired, jet lagged. And with all these weight inside my head, I feel so fucked up.

"Kim," he called again. Why can't he fucking shut his mouth up? Can't he annoy me more?

"I'm sorry for.."

"Can't you fucking shut your fucking mouth!?" I yelled. He stayed quiet and I ignore it even if I feel a little guilty for bursting out like that.

"Look I'm sorry for treating your brother like that."

"He's not."

"What?"

I take a deep breath and sighed. I rolled over and sat up. I don't want to talk about this. I'm too tired. I'm stressed out, can't he see it?

"I'm tired Louis, go prepare for rehearsals already."

"But Kim-" I cut him off by laying down on bed. I covered my face with a pillow and groaned all my irritations away.

"Okay," then it was followed by the door opening and shut afterwards.

Am I doing the right thing? I feel so messed up. It's like I'm a fictional character having nonsense drama. It's like I'm in a movi that the lead star always put up with bullshit. I don't know anymore. I thought I would never stumble back down to these thoughts again. It's like you're lost and everything is just messed uo. You don't have anything to turn to or hide to. I feel so alone.

But I want to be. I want to be alone to be able to think these things through. I know I made the right decision to have Matt back in my life. After hearing his story I felt guilty, and it's such a foreign thing for me to feel. I never felt guilty my entire life, scratch that, my entire life after Matt left me. I'm so selfish, I know that. I have no mercy, obviously. Is it really possible for someone so cold like me turn into this?

Never in my life have I imagined to be like this after all those blood pools and mountain of dead people. I planted a bomb in a tall building with more than a hundred people inside and when they died, I didn't feel guilt. Just today. Just today that I've learned so much from these lads.

It's so foreign, so strange. I silently wish that this have never happened. How did my life turn out like this?

I groaned again when I heard soft knocks against the door. I stood up lazily, will no one understand that I want to be alone? No one wants to be alone, my subconcious remarks and I push her out of my way.

"Hey," he smiled, not sure what to do. I smiled at him and scratched the back of my neck. This is akward. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," I whispered.

We're standing here in complete silence. He's just looking at me while I'm waiting for him to say anythimg while looking down at my feet.

"Are you...."

"You should come inside," I opened the door widely and let him walk inside. He shifted his weight from his left foot to the right before nodding and coming inside.

This is so awkward. We both dont know what to do. I, myself, am afraid to say something wrong.

"So Louis and you?"

"Yea.."

"Total opposites," Matt looked confused and I nodded. I'm confused as he is.

"I think opposites do attract, I don't know," I shrugged.

"What about Harry?"

Yea? What about Harry? I looked up at him and he was looking at me. It's clear in his eyes that he doesn't like Louis, maybe because of what he mentioned a while ago. But what about Harry?

"I know the way Harry looks at you," he smiled at me. "He cares, El."

"Of course, he cares. He's my best friend and I'm his," I quickly defend, ignoring what I'm assuming he means.

"It's not like how you think it is, El," he pushed and I scowled at him. He sighed and patted my back before messing my hair. I rolled my eyes at him and he handed me a hairpin. A plastic one.

"I should probably sleep. Do we have free passes for tonight?" Matt asks in delight.

I am confused. How can serious Matt turn to a Matt like this? Wow, he didn't change at all. I smiled at him and nodded. He chuckled and I remember the days we shared together as kids. Those were the days he would teach me how to ride a bike and he'd laugh because of how scared I was to try again after my first fall.

"Of course, we do. We're VIPs, even," I winked at him.

He was caught off guard about my gesture and I mentally panic what to do. Oh no, I'm messing up again. Shit, why did I even let out my playful side.
"I'm okay. I was just surprised of your cheerful and playful side coming out after all these years," he said in awe.

I scratched the back of my neck and ran a hand in my hair. "See you then?"

"It's not like how you assume it is," he smiled before I close the door. I don't know what the hell he meant but...

"Should this be the last thing I see, I want you to know that it's enough for me. Cause all that you are, is all that I'll ever need." my phone rang and I rolled my eyes.

Way to go, Harry.

Harry was messing with my phone half of the time when we were inside the plane. He told me that he'd install a few things but now he also messed up with my ringtone. It was supposedly a simple tune, not the Marimba cause I hate it. But now he has turned it into one of Ed Sheeran's song. He must know me so well now.

I grabbed my phone and froze when I saw the caller ID.

Should I answer? Of course I have to. I just can't bring myself to answer it. What if he pulls me out of tour and gives me another mission far away from the lads? I don't want to say goodbye yet. I don't want to stay away although I know I have to.

"Jas?" I finally answered, knowing that it's the right decision to choose.