A Taste Of Oblivion : The Short Comings Chronicles VOL1

A KIND OF FEELING : PT3

Sam never talked much about back home, in the Eastern Cape, what was there to talk about, parents who were both doctors, a big brother who was in college in the Western Cape and a sister who loved Twilight, everything about his life was normal, so normal that he couldn't help but expect something to go wrong. He felt lonely at times, just like everyone and his parents worked long hours but made sure that they were there for their children, for him there was nothing to complain about except the mere hidden fact that he was sacred. Sam was never in the closet before, back then when he was naive he fell inlove with a boy. Sam can love and when he loves he loves real hard, he's name was Songezo but they called him Songs and damn did he sing the sweetest lies and Sam believed each and everyone till he realised that all this time Songs was on a ploy, on a ploy to get as many boys he can find in his bed cause Songs was promiscuous, all gays were and him refusing Songs the one thing he wanted resulted in a beating between the boy and the friends that resulted Sam with a broken arm and bruised cheek from hate crime and being called derogatory names till he crawled back to where he came from, the closet where he met Lilonke, his girlfriend.

He never talked about this, how could he, everyone around him never asked and he knows that today is different from yesterday and he changed schools but sometimes fear can do so much damage. But he thought he was ready though cause he looked at the pale boy on his bed, writting down the thesis that he smiled and helped along, was it able to feel a kind of a thing for someone you just met?

As for Liam though, he tried very hard to keep his heart from going to cardiac arrest from the close proximity to Sam. He was writing the thesis but he sure could be writing a damn children's book cause he didn't even know what he was doing,

"We've been at it for an hour now, wanna take a break?" Sam asked the pale boy and he didn't trust his voice enough so he just nodded his head as his ink black hair fell helplessly on his face,

"How about we play 20 questions, the ultimate ice breaker," Sam smiled cheekly at the boy and for the first time since Liam came over he spoke 3 words, which was the most he had spoken since he arrived

"Okay, I'm down," Sam didn't mind the quiteness though as it was a contrasting difference from the constant loud he was used from his family,

"Okay I'll start, favourite colour?"

"Uhm Twilight Fog," Liam answered and left Sam confused a bit,

"Twilight fog, what type of colour is that?" Sam asked but also thought of how ironic it was that the boy reminded him of twilight and his favourite colour was a twilight fog, whatever that was.

"It's a mix of a pale grey and a pale white, not a common colour but I like it as it reminds me of confusion but also calmness as I'm confused most of the time but in that confusion still calm," Liam explain as he nervously darted his eyes everywhere from the rooms white ceiling, to the rooms band posters, the dressers, anything to avoid Sam's gaze, cause Liam was everything, everything but afraid of being judged,

"I know it's silly but-"

"No it's not silly, it's, it's nice and different and mine is grey because why not, grey is the equivalent of being in the middle, black and white, darkness and light and I think as much as we try to say we're fine there's a grey spot in our lives and sometimes that grey is either beautiful or bleak and I regard it as as blank canvas to paint how ever I want, " Sam explained and an ice breaker went from breaking ice to being deep, Sam felt no remorse telling the pale boy this cause as much as they just met, it felt like they knew each other forever.

"Favourite food?"

"Pizza," Liam answered excitedly and Sam couldn't help but laugh, Pizza wasn't food, it was a snack and so they argued back and forth about that till the thesis was long forgotten as they wrote a new one, about a bunding friendship.

They'd hang out almost everyday, every week with hi's thrown in the halls to texts at night and everyday Liam found it hard to not notice the light brown eyes that Sam had and how they would light up everytime he talked about his favourite series 'The Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina' or how they'd be dull after a long days work, he noticed how he had a light stubble and wondered how it would feel when he kissed him and the stubble pricked him, how his big arms would cage him in and how his strong rough hands would venture all over his body, he was so lost in thought he didn't even realise that Sam was staring at him with his own thoughts swirling around.

How he had never noticed the shy yet funny twilight boy, how his ink black hair was soft and so was his voice, the temperature in the room suddenly turned thick as Liam didn't think, he did not, not even once think as his emotions took a toll on him and he leaned forward, Sam was frozen, he didn't even attempt to push the boy back, Liam got closer and closer till he captured the boy's lips in a chaste kiss, a ghost of a kiss so fleeting that one would even doubt that it was there in the first place, he felt the cold lips of Sam and quickly pulled away cause he was foolish, a foolish, foolish pale boy that let his feelings take over and ruin the one thing going for him, how cliche was he to kiss the straight friend he secretly had a crush on,

"I, I- I'm so sorry, I don't k-know, what I was doing, and you're probably straight and-,"

Sam didn't hesitate and in a heart beat locked lips with the boy, he wasn't thinking, he was not thinking, not at all as he caressed his hair, touched the sides of his face and poured all the emotion he felt in the kiss, desperation cause he lacked the touch of a male, fear cause he didn't know the outcome of this and curiosity as he was curious as to how this would end up in.

The pale boy was shocked, gobsmacked and utterly confused that straight Sam was kissing him but nonetheless he melted in the kiss as a zoo erupted from the pits of his stomach, his heart was beating fast, faster than a drum solo and he was sure Sam felt it too as they switched sides and he laid on his back with Sam on top, they pulled away for some air and Liam whispered,

"Samkelisiwe," cause he had finally knew how to pronounce his name perfectly and that resulted in a deep kiss from the said boy, and in an instant the school shirt was clothing too much, they were moving fast, really fast and they knew it but how could you stop too hormonal teenage boys. Liam in the back of his head knew that maybe this would last for tonight only and that he didn't mind and so allowed Sam to lift up his school shirt.
Their heavy breathing was heard throughout the room as everything else faded to the background. Thier hands went from their hair to the hem of their pants, uncertainty evident in both and before they could utter anyword the door bast open revealing a smiling carboncopy of Sam but older,

"Samkelisiwe, umamakho undiza entlo-," (Samkelisiwe your mother is giving me a head- ) and if Liams heart was beating fast this time it wasn't beating at all, Sam was frozen on top of Liam, both shirtless, what a site as his father morphed from smiling to stoic and cleared his throat, voice void of any emotion whatsoever and that was the first time ever in all his life that Sam wished he was anything but normal cause if he wasn't normal then he'd disappear.