Thin Ice- SunSun

[Chapter 23]

Each footstep echoed through the silent library, the boy didn't need to be some where noisy, it was imperative that he could hear himself think. Holding a stoic expression, he made his way past each row of bookshelves, towards the back of the room. His mind flushed with memories that he had once tried to forget. This moment had been long awaited for over a year, it was time he got closure.

At the very last desk, Jake sat, surrounded by books. When Sunghoon messaged him to meet, he wanted it to be straight away, so he invited the boy to his study session. He didn't worry how their talk would affect the other library goers, it was a private library, almost always empty.

Taking the seat next to Jake, Sunghoon let out a sigh. Jake shut a few of his books, joining the cold boy in staring out at the farthest wall of the room. They didn't really know how to start this conversation.

"Why did you come back?" Sunghoon breaks the silence.

Fiddling with the sheets of paper on the desk, Jake bites his tongue. "I made a deal with my mum, on that day, a year ago. If I left for Australia, I could come back for university. That was the only offer, the only way I could be here again."

"Aren't you a whole year early?" Sunghoon asks, confused since him and Jake are the same age.

"Yep, I worked so hard, that I start university this fall. My family thought that I would need to readjust to Korea, that's why I'm here." Jake replies, with a dry smile across his face.

"It's good that you're back, I'm happy for you." The boy meant it, he might have been conflicted about his feeling, but it didn't hurt seeing Jake back by his side. 

"I meant what I said the other day." 

Sunghoon didn't need to hear that, he already knew. Jake wasn't the type to lie, especially not to Sunghoon. The problem was that he couldn't give Jake an answer, he couldn't tell if those feelings were actually still there for him.

Sucking his bottom lip, Sunghoon leans his head back. "Things have changed a lot since you left. I've change a lot."

"I can tell." Jake takes a deep breath in. "I'd like for us to be the same. You can change, the world can change, but not us."

Sunghoon leans forward, resting his head in his hands. "Please don't say things like that."

"Why would you come here if you didn't want me to be honest? I already feel it, it feels like a year ago, I know you can feel it too." 

Sunghoon knew exactly what Jake meant. When the boys were together, there was a rush of emotions, there was still something between them. But he had to keep in mind, that when a year passes, of course there will be feelings there, the boys never got closure. He couldn't let himself get clouded by these feelings, he needed to think things through properly.

Jake felt the distance growing stronger, Sunghoon wasn't going to give in that easily. He worked for a whole year just to be back with who he loved, only to feel like it was almost hopeless.

"I remember when we used to spend all our time here." Jake's eyes become teary talking about the past. 

Sunghoon bares a small smile. This was their special place, the place where they could be themselves, the place where they could hold each other without anyone stopping them. It was surreal being here again, being next to Jake. He couldn't deny that it felt good.

Jake reaches his hand across to Sunghoon's grasping it tightly. "This was where we had our first kiss." 

Their eyes now meeting, they reveal their pain. Both had suffered immensely over that year, longing to be together again. Should they let this go? Move on, leave all of that behind them. It's easier said then done, for their gaze just wouldn't break. The gap between them closing, their lips about to meet.