The Breakfast Club Rewrite (COMPLETED)

Chapter 51

Janus laughed and rolled his eyes. "Completely true." He retorted.

Remus booed again. "Boring! Lies! Deceit! Ro, you didn't tell me we'd be going to see a movie where all the characters do is lie." He shoved Roman hard, nearly pushing him off his chair.

"Hey!" Roman shouldered his brother, pushing him back too. "No shoving!"

"Who says?!"

"Well, if we're seeing a film, then we're in the cinema." Roman reasoned. He shoved Remus again. "So stay still and eat your popcorn."

Remus rolled his eyes and wiggled down in his chair. Logan sighed and threw an imaginary popcorn tub over his shoulder.

"Nah, I'm bored." He declared. "I wanna watch a different movie. Like... horror or something."

Virgil pulled his needles out triumphantly. "Bagsy the monster!" He said.

"Ro bags the monster fucker!" Remus yelled quickly. Roman flushed and glared at his brother.

"Re!"

"What?" Remus asked. "It's true."

"Wait." Janus said. "Let's do this properly."

"How'd you mean 'properly'?" Virgil asked.

"Well, proper casting and everything." Janus said with a shrug. "You know, like how casting directors do it."

"I wanna be the monster." Virgil said, perhaps a little childishly.

"Maybe you will be." Janus said. "But I'd say Rem seems like the best for that role."

Remus snorted. "Jee, thanks Jan." He said sarcastically.

"Hey, it's just an observation." Janus said defensively. "You'd either be the monster or the final girl."

"Why?"

Janus shrugged. "Cause you've got enough gall to either kill the monster or kill others. You're strong. It's pretty impressive." Janus tried not to look at Remus as he said this. Remus smiled gently to himself, his heart glowing for no good reason.

"Boo, boring!" Virgil yelled. "Me and Lo wanted horror, not sappy romance! That's the later showing!"

Remus glared at him, feeling blush touch his cheeks.

"Anyway, what're the rest of us, Mr Director?" Virgil asked, as if nothing had happened.

"Well, Roman's definitely the first to die-" Janus started.

"Hey, mean!" Roman interrupted.

"It's an honest observation." Janus said calmly. "You're not the smartest in the group, you'd probably want to go and fight the monster cause of your stupid chivalry-"

"Or fuck it if it was Virgil." Remus chimed in.

"Would you quit that, Re?" Roman asked sharply. Remus grinned at him.

"And you're very loud." Janus finished as if Remus hadn't spoken. "If this was something like A Quiet Place, you'd be dead in three seconds."

"Hey, I can be quiet!" Roman said, crossing his arms indignantly. Remus raised an eyebrow at him.

"What would I be?" Logan asked.

"The throw-away kill." Janus said. Logan blinked.

"Not even a slight hesitation." He said. He laughed a little. "Okay, explain."

"Well, you're too smart to be killed immediately." Janus said. "But, ultimately, the final girl trope is solidified and you don't fit into it. You need to be killed off somehow. Let's say it was a murder horror." Janus broke off, tapping his cheek as he thought. "You'd be killed by a completely out-of-character choice."

Logan nearly laughed. "Hey, I think we're safe. Let's split up." He mocked. "Like that?"

Janus half-shrugged, half-nodded. "Pretty much." He looked at Virgil. "D'you wanna know who you'd be?"

Virgil shrugged. "Guess it's interesting, yeah."

Janus grinned. "You'd be the savant."

"Oh come on!" Virgil threw his hands up in despair.

"Hey, I'm serious." Janus said. "You're not scary or unhinged enough to be the monster but you know an insane amount about really specific topics." Janus shrugged. "Savant."

"Okay, genius." Virgil snarled. "What'd you be?"

Janus shrugged. "I'd be the monster." He said. "Angry, deformed, would kill, holds grudges." He ticked everything off on his fingers. "Yeah, I'm the monster."

Remus blinked. "Nevermind." He said quickly. "I'm the monster fucker."

We love a candid Remus
Bye,
Blaize