𝘖𝘜𝘛𝘌𝘙 𝘉𝘈𝘕𝘒𝘚 𝘐𝘔𝘈𝘎𝘐𝘕𝘌𝘚 + 𝘗𝘙𝘌𝘍𝘌𝘙𝘌𝘕𝘊𝘌𝘚

TMRW - Kelce

A/N:
This chapter is inspired by the song "TMRW" by Jake Cornell

This whole chapter is in Kelce's POV

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING - slight mentions of a eating disorder and suicidal thoughts ⚠️

Little background on this story:
Kelce wishes he didn't have to think about tomorrow as he is all alone with his heart broken after Y/N left him.

May Contain: M/F, Feels, Fluff, Angst?
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KELCE'S POV:
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"I'm still waiting here like I promised
I just wish that you could have been honest
And tell me that I'm too nice or that your love died
All the way back in August"

One year and six months down the drain... eighteen months of wasting my time on someone who couldn't even be honest with me. Y/N broke up with me a week ago and even though I did see it coming since she has been acting different for the past two months, it still hurts more than anything. I would've preferred getting hit by a freight train than to feel my heart break like this.

But nonetheless, she broke up with me because she needed time to herself and I'm going to patiently wait for her to come back. She could break my heart over and over again and I'd still drop everything to be with her.

"You're the only one that keeps me breathing
And I'm the only one who made sure you were eating
But for you I guess that's all just in the past now
I'm sitting in the background fighting off my demons"

You'd think that because I'm a kook that my life is all sunshine and rainbows but, it is quite the opposite. I feel like money pushes my family further apart from one another because it's so easy to escape using money when things get tough instead of dealing with it. So instead of dealing with my emotions then and there, I've managed to bottle them which has only ever caused me more pain in the end and I always found myself turning to something to numb the pain whether that be alcohol or a drug, or both at the same time.

And when I first met Y/N, I was at my lowest and she saved me. She made me a better man for her and for myself. I would never admit it to her but she was the only reason I kept on going at times. However, whilst she was making me a better person, I was helping her get through her eating disorder as I would sit with her and just eat with her when she struggled.

We were each other's rocks.

But now, as I'm sitting here, alone, I find myself fighting off the demons that she once helped me defeat. I would never let them win but every time I found myself fighting, the more I was finding myself more exhausted so I spent more of my time sleeping the day away.

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Time skip: four weeks later:
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"I don't think that I can live without you
But if I don't die tonight I think I'll have to
Watching my sky fall down through a glass roof
I still spend my nights crying in the bathroom
Drowning out the heartache with a bottle
I never had a pill I couldn't swallow
I remember all the long nights where we had no fights
Not even thinking about tomorrow"

It has been exactly four weeks since Y/N and I broke up and my mental health has rapidly declined. There were times where I genuinely thought it'd be better to die than to keep on breathing but I know that I could never go through with ending my life.

So instead, I have spent many, many nights on my bathroom floor after a party, bawling my eyes out. Alcohol, cocaine and weed became my three closest friends as they helped me cope through these past four weeks. I know Y/N won't be proud of me for getting addicted again but she was no longer there to be my replacement drug so I needed a replacement drug to replace the emptiness I felt of her being gone.

And to think that there were times that I went to sleep not even thinking about tomorrow because she was in my arms and nothing else mattered... I wish I didn't take those seconds for granted.

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Time skip: two months later:
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"I'm still waking up at midnight
It was just another bad dream it's alright
I was reliving that time when you said that you were fine
Then you packed your bags and left me that same night"

I still remember the night she broke up with me...

It was a warm October night and we were all cuddled up, watching our favourite Halloween movies as Halloween was near and I was there with her in my arms, thinking our love would last for forever. I then ended up falling asleep and when I woke up from a nightmare, she was gone. She had left me a note that we were over and to not reach out to her. I woke up from a nightmare only to discover that my life had now become a nightmare.

Since then, I always find myself thinking about that night and just when I think I'm getting better, I feel my heart break even more.

But now here I am... two months down the track and I'm all alone with my heart broke... just wishing I didn't have to think about tomorrow.

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Didn't really proofread this, sorry if it sucks.

This might be the last ever Kelce chapter that I'll ever write unless someone wants another one? I'm also looking at removing Barry from future chapters as well.

The next few chapters that I'll be posting will be preferences for a bit until I'm done writing part two's to certain chapters. Has there been any chapters that you've read so far that you want a part two to? Let me know loves!

Thank you for reading 🤍