Everything in Between

Chapter 8

Chester

I hated it here already.

I thought moving here with mom was going to change everything. I get picked on here too. I guess the world just hates me.

Except Samantha. I couldn't believe she told me she likes me. I was only here for three weeks, but what the hell.

And Mike. It feels like I shouldn't care anymore, he has barely talked to me. He probably still doesn't remember me anyways. It is sad, but what can I do.

He probably thinks I'm just another bully attraction. Maybe that's why he just stared while these big guys were picking on me.

I heard my phone buzz.

'Last day of school tomorrow babe! So excited to spend the summer with you! Luv u<3'

I smiled at my phone.

Maybe the summer away from everything and and everyone will change something. I could just be alone with Sam.

I opened the door to my house and set my backpack down. My house was empty, my mom at work. There was a note in the counter. Dinner's already been made, just needs reheating. I crumple the note and toss it in the trash. Our unspoken code that means, "I read the note."

I wander into the kitchen and grab the plastic tupperware from the fridge. It's Hamburger Helper, same thing she made yesterday. I sigh and grab a can of soda.

I sit at the table with the can and the reheated food. I don't even bother to take the food out of the tupperware. I begin eating and I grab the note pad and pen that my mom always uses to leave notes. I feel like leaving a note,  maybe saying "thanks for dinner" or "I love you."

I scrawl a quick note, tear it out and put it on the center if the table. Then I start writing.

I'm never sure if I should call these poems, or songs, or maybe even a journal entry. It feels like a mix of all three. But I also hear the music playing in my head while I read over the words. I find chords that seem to go well with the words, and then I'm satisfied.

After the tupperware is empty, my soda already long gone, I get up and go to my room. I go to my dresser and look in the mirror.

The blonde hair. I did it because I was tired and bored. I was done with the endless cycle of sameness. I was growing sick of my friends, sick of my dad and my sisters. Sick of myself...

The hair seemed minor, compared to all the other modifications I've had.

I came home one night, maybe three a.m., with a koi fish on my left upper arm. My dad yelled his head of. I was sixteen. Then I got another fish, some creature on my back, and then my flames. My dad screamed and yelled, called me very disobedient. Didn't matter. It numbed me. Then the labret.

I was drunk and I wanted to pierce something. I wanted to do my ears, but a lip ring sounded better.

I inched closer to the mirror and stared at myself. I hated the way I looked. Sure, I got the occasional compliments about my clear skin, my hair, my tattoos. But what I saw was nothing if that sort.

I wanted to throw something at the mirror. I didn't want to look at myself any longer, but I couldn't look away. 

How could Sam like me. Was it even real? It probably wasn't. Been here a month, been with her three weeks. Something wrong was bound to happen.