Lead Me Out Of The Dark. {Austin Carlile Love Story.}

If you feel alone:Author's Note.

 I know everybody goes through tough times, I know. Maybe by listening and reading about other peoples struggles may help you connect to somebody you can talk to or to realize, well maybe my life isn't as bad. I don't want to see that my friends or somebody I know is hurting themselves. I'm going through that right now, I wish I can just stop but there's that time where you just don't think because you're so lost, hurt, scared, depressed. This world isn't easy, but maybe that's why we have to challenge ourselves. Don't take your own life, you all deserve to be here on this planet. No matter what people say to you, just remember that they are nobody if they can't support you, be there, love you or even have anything nice to say then they don't need to be in your life at all.

I went through really though times. My mom walked out on my family more then three times. She came back but I'm so scared she's going to leave. People say why give her another chance? Well because she's my mom. No matter what I will always need her. I've been bullied ever since I started school; Junior Kindergarten. I still get bullied. I never use to let it get to me but it will always be in my head. All the names, fat, ugly, worthless, stupid, attention whore, emo, slut, etc. Its harder on me now then it use to be. It got worse when I was in grade 6 and is still the same. People constantly talking shit about me, people spreading lies about me, people hating on me for nothing. Everybody turns on me, even my own best friends. I don't know if I can even trust anybody. My dad, he doesn't support one bit, not my future plans, who I am now, my music, my looks. The fact that the only my mom supports me after she walked out so many times, makes me sick. I can't get through shit with only support from one person. Everybody looks at me like I'm not from the Earth. My living situation right now, its not the best. Struggling with money, food, clothes. I feel alone, like I have nobody, like nobody understands me. I've been told by so many that I wont amount to nothing, I honestly don't know if I will. Half my family hates me. Music is the only thing saving my life right now.

  I know you all  may have it worse, may think this whole reason I'm depressed is stupid. I know you all may think, oh well get over it, don't listen to people. It may be easy for you, but many people have weaknesses. I may not be able to handle some things, deal with certain things the way a normal person should, talk to people about my problems, trust people, but I'm trying. I've been strong for a long time but now I'm just crashing down, I feel like I have nothing left in me to tell me that it's all going to be okay. To be honest, I don't know if things will be okay. Please, if you guys ever need somebody to talk to, I'm here, I've been through stuff, maybe not as much as you but I understand. I just wanted to take the time to let you all know that there is people having trouble in life just like you. There isn't a need to hide it or hold it back. I'm here. I promise you I wont ever judge you because I know how it feels. I'm not seeking attention nor trying to get sympathy from anybody, I just want to tell you all so you can feel comfortable to come talk to me if you ever need to.