Thirty Three

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There's only silence during dinner. Both Namjoon and Jin avoid each other's eyes. If anyone puts just a little bit of attention they can see they haven't slept well this days. Because they can't stop themselves from thinking about one thing only.

That kiss. How good it felt. How hurtful it was to break it. How obvious it is that should never happen again. Jin is the first one to walk back to his room. He cried so much this days his eyes are puffy and his nose red.

He's sick of being sad. How long is he supposed to keep feeling this way? How much will he have to cry before he finds something that makes him happy? For him, that something doesn't exist. His life has no purpose without Namjoon in it.

He doesn't even go to his company anymore. He lets Jungkook handle the things and guides him from home. The last thing he needs is meeting his father at work. At least the younger boys in the house are aware of his situation and they take care of him. He sits at his desk ready to draw, when someone else comes in

- Hyung?

- Kookie, come in! Is everything okay? How are things at work? If you need anything just

- You don't have to ask about me, I'm fine! Better than ever, actually...

- Is that so? That's amazing! Are you gonna tell me what has so exited?

- I don't know - He smiles - I've been dancing a lot, I guess...

- Dancing? Like...Like the boys?

- N-No! I'm looking for a style that fits better with me. Though Tae says if I become a stripper I'll kill everyone with my abs, and my thighs

- Didn't wanna picture that

- Sorry - They laugh - Listen... I've been thinking...

- Yes?

Jungkook wonders if this is a good idea. Taehyung said they need to give Jin a little push. And he really hopes this works

- Can you design something for me to wear? To dance! Not like the clothes you did for Tae but something more...chill. More street style! I like big comfy things! Can you?

- Of course I can! Anything for you!

He starts drawing with a smile and Jungkook feels relieved. He wants to see him happy

- I'm gonna let you do that then. I have a dance-date with Tae!

- Oh, and Kook... Don't be mad at Namjoon

-  B-But Jin he-

- Don't get me wrong, he messed up but... he's not a bad person.

- Hmmm, okay. But just so you know, you're the best person I know in the world, Jin. I wanna be like you. Namjoon made me get to know my friends. But you made me want to stay.

- That's the cutest things you ever said to me...Now go, before I cry again

- Don't cry, you'll get more wrinkles than you already have, old man

- Jungkook! What did we say about joking about my age?!

- Hahahaha sorry hyung! Good night!

He leaves the room and Jin keeps drawing. He's amazed of how much they're enjoying the things he makes. The things he designed himself. When he was younger he was embarrassed of showing it. But now confidence is starting to get to him.

He looks up and sees all the drawings he has stick to his wall. Between them, a dress. The one he wanted to use on his wedding with Namjoon. He never dared to use one before, but was sure that day would be the perfect one for it.

He takes it ready to throw it in the trash. There's no use for that anymore. But before he can do it, something makes him uncomfortable. Something is wrong. Why should he get rid of something he likes? Because Namjoon's not there? But that dress wasn't for Namjoon...it was for him.

Out of an impulse he starts changing the design. The wedding dress becomes something more simple but still elegant. The white color he chose before is now red. He doesn't think about what he's doing. He doesn't register what's the point. It's not out of spite. It's not to distract himself from sadness. It's just because he enjoys it. For the first time he does something for himself.

A few mornings later, Namjoon drinks the coffee he made for himself in the kitchen. He woke up kind of late for work since he couldn't sleep well last night. He's almost done when he sees him walk down the stairs. He chokes, spitting coffee all over his suit.

He looks amazing. Out of this world. Wearing the most flattering dress he ever saw. A part of him worries Jin is trying to look good for him. And he doesn't feel strong enough to reject him. But that's not what's happening at all. Jin walks past him, taking his things before leaving for work without even making eye contact.

The few seconds he has seeing Jin walk near him make him feel breathless. His heart goes crazy. He looks so beautiful. So unreachable. And yet this is the moment he ignored him completely. He's sure that's a good thing. He can handle this...right?

Next Chapter

I could dance all night if it's in your arms

I see you two are getting along...

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Aaaaah, Jiiiiin! You go, King! What a man hahaha We know he looks amazing in skirts. And a red dress? *Flashbacks* Fire. Next time we'll see some Taekook

I hope you're having a great day! Here it's 46°C today. I had to wash my dog using a hose, so he could be fresh.

See you on Tuesday!

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See you on Tuesday!

- Baby Y

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