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im so fucking pathetic.. it's actually funny.

head empty, thoughts loud. thats how i communicate to my loved ones that something is wrong but i didnt tell them what it means so they dont fucking get it and i could tell them but my brain is convincing me that if they cared they shouldve already known and done something about my behavior change.. fuuuucckkk this. i wanna die. im going to die. im going to kill myself. probably. if you hear from me, then i was too much of a pussy to pull the fucking trigger.

may god help us all :)

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