Wingless Illyrian

Part eighteen

Keena hadn't heard the rest of the answer when she had asked where Rhysand was. She had changed after speaking to Cassian that morning. The nightmares were still present, as were the trips to the bathroom to hurl up whatever she had eaten earlier, but she wanted to fight. And that meant regaining the muscles she had lost. The training rings on the roof were good enough for the simple exercises, but she still needed a sparring partner. 

With Cassian at the camps, and Azriel on a mission, she had no choice but to ask the already busy high lord for a partner. 

She had landed outside of the mountainside house, courtesy of Mor who had duties to attend to in the court under the mountain. Her own abilities were being kept to a minimum, at least until she was able to regain some control. 

The house had been completely silent. Not unusual for when Rhysand was alone and working. It was only when the others were around that things tended to get loud. 

She strode into the dining room, to see him at the head of the table filled with plates of breakfast. 

"I need a sparring parner." She said as she picked a pastry off a small towered plate.

"Good morning." She rolled her eyes.

"Good morning, Rhysand. Can you train with me?" He eyes her clothes, it had been too long since he saw the Illyrian leathers on her body. 

"You're back in leathers. I see you made some amendments." He was looking to the long black sleeves that covered her arms, and the gloves over her hands, and the higher neck.

"I don't like how the pants move when I take steps." She didn't mention how the cuffed sleeves reminded her of the thick, faebane cuffs that had drained her of her powers. 

"It looks good. Why don't you join us for breakfast, I can join you in the rings after." She turned in the direction of his pointed head. 

There was a girl. 

Keena squinted her eyes, as though it would give her a better view. 

"Kee, this is Feyre."

"You're engaged to the High Lord of Spring." Feyre blinked in surprise.

"We were to be married, had Rhysand not interrupted." She glared at the man across the table. Keena's head shot to Rhysand.

"I was under the impression that you wanted to be taken. Afterall, you were pleading for someone to make it stop." 

"I want to go home."

"You don't like our Court?" Keena asked. 

"The land is fine, the people on the other hand." Feyre shot a look to Rhysand. 

"Right," Keena said unsurely. "I can find someone else to train with. Maybe I'll try the stairs." She didn't know how much Feyre knew about the Court. Her obvious disdain meant she hadn't seen the city. "I hope you both have a good day." 

"Are you winnowing back by yourself?" Rhysand asked, suddenly hit with a wave of worry.

"I was going to try. I'll be okay, short steps only." Rhysand stood from his seat and pulled her into an embrace. 

"I'm really proud of you Kee." For a moment they forgot about the company eying them cautiously. 

"I can help with anything if you need it. Don't do this alone again. You're not alone."

"I will send you over some work if you get bored. But focus on yourself for a while. Love you, little princess." 

She weakly smiled as she pulled away. Rhysand had gone through as much as any of them, and yet he never let himself pause. As if a second to himself would cause the Court to crumble. 

She winnowed away without another word. 

A serious look settled over Rhysand's face as he turned back to Feyre.

"I can't stop you from running back to your Court and telling Tamlin all that you have found out. But she stays out of it. I know you overheard my conversation with Mor. I won't force you into a vow of silence. But if anything happens to her, even the slightest scratch, caused by the information you share with him, there will be no hesitation." He scratched a claw across her mental shields." And with that, he turned back to his food and resumed eating as if nothing had happened. 

"Why is she so important to you?" Feyre pushed.

"She came along when I thought the world was damned. She showed us that even the darkness deserved to be loved. She is innocent, and has already gone through too much. Know that any threat posed against her, is one against the entire court."

"You love her?"

He remained silent. He had already shared more than he meant to. Despite all of his other threats being empty, Rhysand meant every word of this one. 

None of them knew exactly what had happened to her while she was under the mountain. But she wasn't with the Illyrians like they thought. At least not the entire time. 

What happened in the forty years after her disappearance was unknown. But Rhysand had heard whispers. And if they were true, he would spent his entire live hating himself for the pain that he caused her. He owed it to her to protect her now.