Warnings : depression / suicidal thoughts /self harm / mentions of abuse /drug abuse / trigger warning / really depressing and sad / try of suicide
Genre : sad at the beginning , fluff at the end
About : Draco and hiss goons making fun of you for years , after the summer holiday you've changed completely, not smiling anymore , not with your friends anymore , looking tired and never saying anything anymore .
DO NOT READ WHEN SENSITIVE WITH THE CONTENT !!!!
TW! ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️
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Y| N pov :
Dracos goons made fun of me today , so did pansy , I've got a bad grade on the test .
I'm sitting on the cold bathroom floor , having the blade pressed against the palm of my hand , about to give my skin another cut . It hurts , there's blood everywhere, I'm sobbing . But I can't seem to stop .
All the things they've said , everyone in my life , it goes so deep . I've kept my head high , always .
But this is it . I can't anymore , I'm only a human , a teenager . A lot of people don't know , I fought with a huge Xanax and drug abuse . I've tried to lose myself. And I'm starting all over again . I've tried to ignore them . But if everyone at every step your taking is hating you , telling you to kill yourself , where's the point then .
I cut one last time , feeling numb , I sniff in and take a huge breath .
I clean up everything with my wand , Lettin it all look good again .
I step outside the toilet and close the stall behind me . As i Walk up the hall I hear Draco and his group talking . I stop to listen to what they are saying . Trying to stop the thoughts in my head taking the best of me . I sit in the corner , trying to hide my face in my hoodie . Looking out while listening. They haven't noticed me . I hear crabbe say " why doesn't she kill herself , shed do all of us a favour " I look up to see them all laughing at that .
I see pansy and her girls walking up to them , she goes ti sit on blaises lap . " what're y'all talking about " she says laying her head on his shoulder , oh how I want ti know what if feels to do so , the person not being disgusted by my head laying on the shoulder. " just about L|N and how she should just kill herself and do us a favour , stupid bitch , she's just a waste of space " I look down , feeling embarrassed about myself . Outch.
I feel tears pooling in my eyes , because it was Draco this time saying this . I liked him . To his friends he's great , he's smart and cute . I'd wish for him to like me too. I really liked him actually .
" a you guys do know she's been sitting there since I came here " pansy says " she probably heard us " I hear Zabini mumble . "Yea , she should , she knows what everyone is thinking "goyle says laughing .
I stand up , tears invading my sight . I look down not wanting them to see me crying . I ran off to the tower , sitting with my legs dangling over the edge . Crying with my head leaning on the railing , I'm hurt , so so hurt .
I just wanna be appreciated .
I always try my best to help others . Giving them all they need . Helping where I can , but why can I rescue everyone but me . I'm drowning . Im a burden .
I cry and cry, not stopping . Not finding an ending . I then stand up . I think it's time . I crawl over the railing , the rain hitting my clothes . My fingers cold on the railing , the only thing from keeping me up for the fall . My hairs moving out of my face because of the wind .
I'm cold , so cold . Suddenly I let loose . This is it . I smile falling . I won't be a burden anymore .
Dracos pov : I've gone too far . I'm yelling at my friends , throwing spells at them "ARE YOU DUMB ,DONT U DARE TO EVER SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN! " I ran out of the common room searching for her what've I done . I can't find her so I ran into the Gryffindor common room , all her old friends looking at me . She's loved by everyone other then some stupid shits , I scream for them to help me .
Granger rams up to me hearing y|n s name .
" what WHAT ?" She says as soon as I'm telling her . She slaps me hardly . I deserve more then that , i tell myself .
We all run to find her . Shes nowhere found . Harry then pulls out his map , granger all the Weasleys and Luna looking at it . We are all waiting to find her . "There she is " , " wait why is she moving this way " granger says alarmed . No ,
I ran , I know what she's on about all of them following me hurriedly. Then I see her , her hands clenching on the railing , tears falling down in the wind . I see her letting lose , falling .
NO
I mumble a swift spell , si are all the others . I see her smiling and then blacking out .
I ran up to her . Taking her into my arms crying and screaming.
Dumbledore and Snape running hurriedly into our direction . " What's ..." Snares eyes falling onto y/n , she's always been like a daughter to him . Tears pooling in his eyes , Dumbledore is apparating all of us into the hospital wing Madame pomfrey running and taking her from me all of us are crying so I'm hiding in each other's chest soaking they are shirts why didn't we realise before she needed us before and we start realising just now I'm feeling more than terrible I feel like it should've been me falling down there not her.
I love her I always loved her I just thought I never could get her with her being the perfect person she is gorgeous cute lovely everything she means everything to me so I start bullying her that of course doesn't mean I should've done that because I definitely shouldn't have. But I didn't know how else to get her attention . I see the teachers working on a potion together to keep her awake and keep her alive.
Pomfrey knowing that all of us will be here tonight gives all of us a bed and a warm soup and some water telling us that she's gonna be alright again and that we'll see her again .
We all think her as she move somewhere around the room I move my chair onto her bed grabbing her hand and kissing it softly moving a strand of hair out of her face.
I lay down my head on her chest while the others are soundly asleep since it's already really late .
All of us agreed to stay here tonight until she wakes up tomorrow.
I feel hard rubbing my hands I look up hopefully and see her looking directly confused sad and angered.
I start crying and kissing her. You're alive you're alive I say full of hope and thankfulness she looks at me confused.
"Y|N , please never do that again I can't live with myself without you I love you darling I can't bear to lose you.
Please never do this again I love you so much I'm sorry I never told him sorry for everything I did I can't put it in the words but I love you I love you so much please never do this to you please never do this again don't do this to us . I'm sorry I did and said what I said you wanna know why you did that because I'm a fucking stupid dumb bitch, I knew I couldn't get you you're so perfect you're my perfect The person I think of before going to bed the person I think of before going to school."
It's all I'm saying before I kiss her lips. I feel her kiss me back .
"Please talk to me whenever you feel like this okay I will I'm going to be there for you we were all going to be there for you" I Motion behind me at the group sleeping snuggles up .
"I will she " whispers.
-/Dumbledore pov :
"This will be the start of a huge and strong and passionate love , true love , they really are soulmates " I whisper , Severus looks at me . "Yea" he whispers softly , "she's save now " I say patting Severus shoulder , moving out of the way ,
A soft smile on my lips knowing that these two are perfect together they're soulmates they will always find each other again whatever happens.
I know Severus loves her like his own. He finds lily in her .
I see him smile softly looking at them . Then also moving out of the room .
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Hey guys I hope you like this this one was full of emotion. This all is based off my imagination nothing in this imagine comes from me or is based of my real life experience so I hope everything I've written is right and not wrong written.
If you feel like in this imagination please search for help I'm always open you can always write me I will always listen to you.
Always remember you are loved! I love you so much and I promise you will get better.
Ilysm stay happy and healthy
Love , A
