Arish's pov:
After that event everybody from the internet is in speculation kung para kanino ang kantang sinulat ni dwayne nung fiesta. I didn't really care as long as walang inosenteng madadawit.
My name was mentioned by one person, that person was speculating that it's me since we have childhood and group photos on multiple accounts. Hinayaan ko nalang silang mag isip kung sino at para kanino yun.
My schedule went back to normal which is fine with me, although napansin din nila na medyo tumaba ako.
These are the bad side of modeling you have to stay in shape no matter what, which is somehow tiring sometimes.
I had a long day, napagalitan pa ako ni Ingrid dahil sa weight gain ko, muntik pa akong mawalan ng sponsorship dahil dun. I'm tired and exhausted.
Umupo ako sa sofa ko at hinilamos ang kamay sa mukha. Tao pa din naman ako! Nag kaka laman din minsan, it's not like nag bago na buong pag katao ko pag nag karoon ako ng konting weight. The weights that I gained is not even too much and why does body weight matter anyway? We're beautiful in our own way, size, color, height, shape, It doesn't matter.
My phone suddenly rang when I looked at the caller id, it's ate Daisy.
"Hi ate, Bakit ka po napatawag?"
[ Fuck! Naiinis ako sa babae ni dwayne ah! I'm here at his condo and he is wasted. Ayaw niyang makinig saakin! I'm pregnant at ang tigas ng ulo nito! Can you please help me talk some senses sakanya? ]
Why me? "O-ok saan siya ate?"
[ Sa dating condo niyo pa din, please make it fast babes ]
Nag drive ako papunta sa condo namin dati sa bgc. Makita at marinig ko palang yun ay ang bilis na ng tibok ng puso ko, ang tagal ko din iniwasan yung lugar na yun tapos nandito ako ngayon papunta dun.
Bgc is my Cornelia street, I'm afraid to cross it again.
Pag pasok ko sa loob I saw that nothing changed, kung ano yun nung umalis ako ganun pa din.
"Ate" tawag ko kay ate Daisy na naka upo sa kama kaharap ni Dwayne na nakaupo lang sa flooring ng kwarto namin dati.
Ate daisy looked at me and rolled her eyes at Dwayne, her baby bump is big, I'd say mga seven months or so.
Tumingin saakin si Dwayne at ngumit ng konti. Anong nginingiti ngiti nito?
"I'll go grab some fruit shake, naiirita ako kay Dwayne mamaya maging kamukha yan ng anak ko, Ayoko!" Natawa ako sa sinabi niya at umupo ako sa bed niya nakaharap sakanya "What's up? Bakit ka nag kakaganyan?" He looked down and smiled sadly.
Tumayo ako mula sa kama niya at tumabi sakanya, he faced me habang natulo luha niya.
"Buntis si hanna" Ang sakit ng tibok ng puso ko, tama pa bang nandito ako? "Oh why are you like this? Diba dapat masaya ka?" Ngumit ako ng malungkot
"D-dream mo mag kaanak diba" i tried talking straight but there was something stuck in my throat, sinubukan kong wag maiyak at pinunasan nalang ang luha niya gamit ang hinlalaki ko.
"Ayaw niya sa anak namin" nanlaki ang mata ko sa sinabi niya "What do you mean? Bakit?"
He rested his head on my shoulder "Hindi daw siya ready magka anak"
What does she mean na di ready? What is she gonna do with the baby?
"Ano na gagawin mo?" He shrugged "Hindi ko na alam" Ang daming tanong sa isip ko na alam kong makukulitan siya pag tinanong ko pa kaya nanahimik nalang ako.
"Basta ang alam ko lang hindi ko hahayaan ipalaglag niya anak ko, kahit sumama pa siya sa lalaki niya. Sakin ang anak ko" I nod at him, all this time ba may iba si hanna? Nag paraya ako sa di deserve, but what can i say it's Dwayne's choice.
I looked deep in his eyes "You'll be a great dad" I assured him making him smile "Kaya ko naman diba?" Curious na tanong niya sakin so i just nodded.
"Of course kaya mo!" Kinuha ko ang mukha niya para tumingin saakin "You'll be the best dad, I'm so proud of you" nangilid ang luha sa mga mata niya
"Paano mo nasasabi at nagagawa yan sakin?" I raised an eyebrow confused because of what he just said.
"Paano mo ako nagagawang supportahan knowing na nasaktan kita ng sobra?"
"Honestly, hindi ko din alam paano ko nakakaya. Basta ang alam ko lang best friend mo pa din ako, before all the shit that we went through naging best friend moko" yakap ko sakanya "Let's forget about the past and face the present"
Tumayo na ako at tinapik siya "Tumayo ka na diyan at sundan natin si ate daisy sa Starbucks mamaya mag kape yun"
"Bakit Starbucks?" I rolled my eyes "Hindi niyo ba siya nakikita? Dun siya lagi nakatambay" Agad niyang kinuha ang wallet at cellphone at pinuntahan na namin siya.
I feel light. I finally had the courage to forgive, not because I still love him, but for myself. Ang tagal ko ang tagal ko nang nakakulong sa galit at ngayon mas pipiliin ko nang iwanan lahat yun sa nakaraan.
My heart felt at ease because of what i did, but i won't forget to put boundaries between us.
Pag dating namin sa Starbucks nakita namin si ate daisy na nainom ng frappe.
"Ate sabi na ni kuya sage na bawal ka mag kape diba!" She rolled her eyes as she caressed her baby bump "Ikaw nga sinabihan ko na wag mangbabae di mo sinunod!" Rebat ni ate kaya natawa ako ng sobra.
He rolled his eyes at inagaw ang kape "That's different" kinurot ni ate sa pisnge si Dwayne "Ang cute mo noh! Napaka tanga anong different!?"
"Sinasabi mo ba na masarap ang bawal!?" He groaned as he massaged his cheek "Ginagawa mo na nga ate!"
Ate daisy pouted "Lika dito Arish, hug moko" sabi niya as she hugged me tight caressing my nose and face "Ang ganda mo"
"Pinag lihiian ka na ni ate" natatawang sabi ni Dwayne kaya wala na kaming nagawa at napa order na din sa Starbucks.
YOU ARE READING
Courage: Dwayne Buenavides (Hectic Band # 1)
RomanceWhat matters is you have the COURAGE to walk away from something you taught was love. "I finally had the courage to forgive, not because I still love him, but for myself" Crdts to Pinterest for the cover