Can You Not?

Chapter 12: Uh oh

We drove to breakfast in silence because I started balling my eyes out and nobody knew what to do. I explained it to them but I was still upset. They asked me if we should turn around but I refused, not wanting to go near him. We got to iHop and got into a booth. "So are you going to ask him?" "No I'm going to pretend like it never happened and I don't know a thing. I want to be friends and I still love him and all of that will go down the drain is I do say something." I replied to Sam. "Mar what are you nuts? your just going to let him get away with this?" "I'm willing to do anything for Dan even if it means breaking my own heart instead of his to keep it in" "Mar I'm with you." Marissa said. "Thanks Marissa and after this can we stop at the drug store to pick up my anti- depression pills?" I asked. We ate out breakfast while we chatted about what our plans were for the next week.

Margo's dream~~~~~~~

"Look Margo I need to tell you something." Dan said as I was putting my shirt and pants back on. "Anything babe." I laughed and started kissing him intensely. "Margo I'm sorry, I really am. I love you with all of my heart and soul and I didn't mean to and It just kind of happened. Your going to hate me and I can see why. But I just want you to know that I love you, your beautiful, kind and passionate. But you don't deserve me at all for what I've done."

DANS P.O.V ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Amelia sat on my bed, combing her hair while I was on the phone. Amelia knows about Margo and I guess is totally okay with that. I just hope she dosent find out. Shed be heart broken. I Know this is really wrong and not like me to do, but Amelia has something about her that is so charming, i always end up having her stay. God I'm messing up. "Babe you need to go get your cast off in 20 mins" She said She grabbed one of my old t-shirts out of my drawer and put it on. She was so beautiful, yet I was awful for doing this. Every time I saw Margo, my stomach churned. I needed to stop doing this. What am I going to do. I already lost Margo most likely forever and I don't want to forgive my self. Heck even if I wanted to forgive myself, I wouldn't be able to. I don't know what even make me do this in the first place. Margo and her family have known me all my life and I basically am betraying them. God I ****** up. So badly.

I continued getting ready while Amelia was sitting on my bed. I wanted to tell her to leave and never return but I couldn't. My heart was apparently turning black because it was corrupting my brain to do awful, awful things. I had on a Rolling Stones t-shirt and a pair of black skinny jeans, along with some white converse.

MARGO'S P.O.V~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dan came over to my house looking great I must say. He was biting his lip and looked extremely guilty. I knew that something was wrong and the thought of him cheating was corrupting my mind. I tried to put it back behind all of my other thoughts but it kept me up at night. I kept having strange dreams where he admits it that he was cheating this whole time. I could've just been over reacting but this felt too real. I can still be wrong. I hope I'm wrong. I needed to get this out of my mind.

Me and Dan drove to the hospital where we waited for 2 hours before he went and got his cast off. His skin was really dry and we drove to the drug store and grabbed some lotion. Dan acted pretty normal but his mouth said something else while his eyes looked far away. God I could see that he loved me, he really really did, but he did something horrible that was hidden behind his iris, infesting his mind.

Dan's P.O.V~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next morning.
"Man I'm screwed you need to help me what am I going to do." I panicked. The look on Margo's face repeating over and over in my mind as I told her what I did. "Dan you just need to calm down. You did screw up and we all do but you just need to tell her. The longer you wait the worse it becomes." Derrick sat in my desk chair while I cried and punched my face into the pillow a long with my fists. "But GOD WHY DID I DO THAT. I LOST HER MAN!!! I CANT CALM DOWN BECAUSE MARGO IS GONE AND IM BREAKING HER HEART AND WHAT IF SHE DOES SOMETHING STUPID AND I DONT KNOW AND ITLL BE MY FAULT AGAIN!! I LOST HER AND YOU DONT KNOW HOW THAT FEELS. MARGO IS MY EVERYTHING AND IM THE WORST PERSON EVER. THE GUILT IS RAGING INSIDE AND IM AT MY BREAKING POINT. AMELIA IS LIKE A DRUG. SHES SCREWING MY WHOLE LIFE UP AND I CANT BLAME ONLY HER. it's my fault." I screamed so loudly I think I might have just snapped. My face was bright red and there was a lump in my throat. Derrick was staring at me and he looked like he wanted to say something but he couldn't. "Look. I don't know what to do. But you've got to face the fact that you cheated on Margo and you need to tell her. You can't keep sleeping with Amelia." He said and left. Wow he knows how to make someone feel better. Jackass. I laid on my bed and wiped the sweat off my forehead. I tried to sleep but I couldn't get it off my mind. Ugh. Just then someone knocked on the door, It was Margo and she was looking down at her feet. "Hey what's up?" I asked her. "Dan I'm done acting like it's all okay." Oh no. She knows. "W-w-w-what are you talking about babe?" "I know what you did Dan." "Margo please tell me what your talking about.". She looked down at the ground for about 30 seconds before she grabbed Amelia's green Chapstick and said "This isn't yours." A single tear rolled down her left cheek as she looked me in the eyes. "It's um it's Sam's he left it in here this morning." I feel like I have no control and my mouth is spitting out things faster than my brain is thinking about what to say. "That's just a stupid like that's full of shit just like you are Dan. I know all about what you did and I'm not letting you beat around the bush anymore." She said bluntly as she stood in the doorway. "Mar please let me make it up to you. I'm sorry." God another wrong move. "God so it's all okay now? Your just gonna take me somewhere and it'll be all okay? Who even is this bitch your sleeping with and how many times has she been showed in your closet while I'm there huh?". This time I couldn't say anything. She was completely right.
After maybe 10 minutes, she yelled "When are you going to tell me its all a misunderstanding? When are you going to say that it's not what is looks like or that your innocent Dan? because I want you to tell me the truth. I thought you were better than that you dick." I looked at her as more and more tears sprung out of her eyes. "Margo I'm sorry." I said very weakly. "Bull shit." she mumbled and ran out the door crying hysterically. She's right. I am a dick.

thank you guys so much for staying with me! I'm seriously so freaking sorry I haven't updated in so long it's been a long combination of dance class, PSSA's and Drama club but I'm pulling through. thanks for reading and I love you all💖. -M