1944 [n.h]

chapter twelve

I was terrified. My hands were trembling as if I were frozen. Not a light was on in the entire village, we were sunk in to the darkness of the night. The village had only been forced in to a blackout once before, and last time it happened, London, only a few miles out, got bombed.

Ruth was stuck with us, trembling much like me as we, my brothers and my mother stayed huddled close in the living room. We could hear the ever so faint sirens from London city in the background, like a haunting melody, repetitive, ringing in everybody's ears.

Everybody held their breaths- as if it would make a difference. We felt like we couldn't move a muscle from the fear of something high up in the sky noticing and killing us all.

And yet in this time of sheer fear, I was worried about Niall. Was he safe in the shelters? Surely that's why the planes were flying over us. They wanted to bomb the army bases.

Then our bodies shook as a plane roared above the roof as if it were right outside the window. A whimper escaped Ruth's lips, she was trapped with us instead of her family and she must have been terrified.

I was terrified without Niall, despite the circumstances, I would have felt safe if he was here to comfort me. But he wasn't. It then dawned on me that he was probably in danger. Why else would they be trying to bomb an area outside of the city?

"What about Niall ad Robert?" I squeaked in to Ruth's ear as she looked at me and shrugged quietly.

"I think we have more important problems than two dumb soldiers." She scolded as I widened my eyes. I thought she and Robert were 'madly in love' or at least something more than the status she just described it in.

I was sitting here, terrified for Nialls safety and worrying endlessly about him and Ruth was sitting beside me and couldn't care less whether Robert was dead or alive. I didn't know how managed to keep her feelings for people at bay so easily. Robert treated Ruth like a queen, he showered her in gifts and kisses and saw her nearly every day and yet I bet, when she said I love you to him, she was only saying it, not meaning it.

Breaking through the silence of the night, a huge rumble rang through our ears before an almighty bang that shook the house, the teapot rattling off the kitchen table and smashing to the floor. Henry gave a loud shriek and attached himself to my mother as she clung to him and pressed her damp cheek to his.

"They're bombing." Archie said gravely as I squeezed my eyes shut and fisted the wearing fabric of the couch. We were one of the only families in the village who hadn't built a bomb shelter, purely because we didn't have the facilities or anybody to help us, and now we were paying for it.

But then, Archie's words sunk it, and my heart plummeted.

Niall.

What was happening to Niall?

Had he just been bombed?

Was he struggling for breath?

Lying lifeless under a pile of rubble?

I needed to know. I couldn't sit here helpless. I looked up from my lap as Archie's eyes connected to mine. He could sense the look of fear going through my eyes before shaking his head.

I couldn't stay here and just wait to hear news. I couldn't stay here when I could be out there helping Niall.

I knew what I was about to do would get me in deep and dirty trouble, if not killed, but I had to risk it, Niall would have done the same for me.

"Lilly..." Archie said dangerously slow as I shook my head. "Lilly!" He yelled as I stumbled up and bolted to the door. I heard him call my name once more as I ran down the deserted streets, my feet hitting my the top of my thighs as I ran as fast as I could through the night. He wasn't stupid enough to follow me. Nobody would have been dumb enough to follow me out here.

And yet I ran. Determined to find Niall. I panted and gasped for breath as I skidded up to the gates of the army barracks. It was silent. Dead silent. No smoke or bombs or dead bodies. It was near enough peaceful.

It was difficult to see, every single house light, street light, lamp was out. We were in the middle of a blackout and therefore left in the deadly darkness. And it then hit me, that I was alone out here. Niall, clearly was inside his barracks, safe, meanwhile, I was out here.

I was out here.

And a bomb had gone off.

The bomb may have been one of many, maybe even a missed target, aiming for the barracks but instead missing. Maybe the planes were on their way back around at this very moment, flying fast towards the barracks for a second attempt at dropping a bomb.

I turned around, facing back to the town and then spotted smoke and flames lighting up the night sky in the distance.

I needed to find Niall. I'd got this far and I didn't want to return back to safety without knowing he was alright.

I continued to search the streets, whispering a yell of his name before falling silent as I started to hear deep voices, muttering away in another language.

My heart stopped beating. I needed to get away. I started to walk again, my feet stumbling over one another as I tried to escape before my body collided with another. My mouth opened to scream until a hand stopped me.