1944 [n.h]

chapter twenty two

"Nathan!" I screamed, anger and frustration fuming in my voice as I struggled to get out of his grip. I wanted to get back to Niall, I wanted to hold Niall, wanted to be with Niall.

I had made it clear to Nathan that I wasn't interested, that what we never had was over. I'd never loved him, if anything, Nathan was a distraction. I knew what I had done was wrong, wildly inappropriate but at first, I hadn't known I was doing it, Nathan was nice and he took my mind off of Niall.

It wasn't until a month or two in to it all, that it hit me, I didn't love Nathan, I didn't even like him, I was with him so I could forget about Niall. But it never worked, and I'd ended it.

"Nathan?" Niall growled and looked to me. "Fucking Nathan?" He yelled as I squirmed and pulled in his grip. I just wanted to get Niall. I just wanted Niall. I didn't want Niall to be mad, the idea of him being mad at me made me want to sob. I hadn't loved Nathan, and it was not, in any way shape or form to betray Niall or to make him feel unwanted. He was all I ever wanted.

"She's going with me, so you best be back off home." Nathan threatened as I glared at him. I couldn't believe this. Nathan had known for months that I still loved Niall and wanted out of our relationship. And I'd finally done it, and now he was acting up. He was a coward.

"Let me go." I growled, tugging and pulling as Nathan slowly shook his head, Niall storming forward and ripping Nathans hand off of me, pulling me forcefully behind his back as I obliged, I was in no hurry to move anywhere else.

I held Niall tightly, his act filling me with hope that he wasn't completely angry at me. Or at least as angry as he should have been.

"She's not going with anyone, you best back off." Niall threatened viciously. His jaw was clenched shut and he spoke through gritted teeth, one of his hands gripping my arm. I watched, terrified as the small square began to fill with people wanting to see what was going on, my mother, my worst nightmare being one of them.

This was turning in to a scene and it was making me feel ill. Not only was Niall coming back for me a big enough deal, but the fact everyone thought I was with Nathan made everything so much worse. And I don't expect that this showdown was going to help in any way.

"Where have you been then Niall? Because the war ended almost a year ago"" Nathan spat angrily, going in for the kill. I clenched my fists around the material of Nialls jacket, clinging on for dear life. I didn't want Nathan to make Niall leave, not now, not now that I had him back. I didn't want Niall to feel bad or for Nathan to make Niall feel unwanted, because it wasn't true.

Of course Niall couldn't have come as soon as the war finished, he had a family and I had expected him to go to them first, they hadn't seen him for longer than I hadn't, and they would have missed him as well.

"It's none of your business" Niall growled, his fists were clenched angrily by his sides as I shook, burying my face in to Nialls back in fear. I didn't want this fight to happen, I didn't want anyone to get hurt. These weren't my intentions.

"Well I've been here." Nathan then said slowly as I shook my head. No he wasn't going to do this to Niall. "I've been here, loving Lilly with every last inch of me." He growled as I felt Niall stiffen, his whole body going rigid as I refused to let go of him. "And she's been loving me back, completely."

"No, no not you." Nialls voice was no longer as strong. I felt myself losing him. Why had I gone along with Nathan? Was I so stupid that I needed someone to numb the pain of Niall? Could I not have just coped by myself?

Niall sounded defeated.

It broke my heart hearing Niall like that. Like Nathan had won. I didn't want Nathan to win. Nathan was being cold hearted and blatantly lying to break Niall down. I don't know why he was doing it either, no matter what happened, I wouldn't love Nathan and I wouldn't be with him, so he was just causing more destruction than need be.