His Little Dove (Bill Cipher X Reader)

A Great Escape

(Warning: Sudden Violence)

Bill watches two of those pesky guards run after the human he knocked off the deer. Yeah, (Y/N) will most likely die, but so what? He got half the police distracted! Bill turns to face the left side and jumps off the running animal. He tumbles and falls on grass as the other two officers notice Bill gone. Bill struggles to his feet.

By the time the man is standing, the gargoyle and manotaur are already trying to grab him. Bill jumps up and jabs both his legs into the manotaur's twelve-pack. Apparently Bill is stronger than he looks as the kick sends the manotaur stumbling back a couple of steps. Bill manages to land on his feet and uses the remaining momentum to run. The manotaur climbs onto the gargoyle's back and they take flight. The gargoyle takes out a taser gun and shoots electricity at Bill.

"Too bad I don't have a giant eye for you to target!" Bill quips as he dodges electric bolts. The taunt seems to anger the cops more as the manotaur takes out his own taser gun and doubles the amount of electricity going after Bill.

"That's not fair!" The gaps between bolts get smaller and smaller until Bill finally gets hit. He collapses and feels nothing in his limbs. Bill watches the officers land and approach him. They force the stunned Bill to his feet.

"The human got away," A Harpurabe officer rejoins the group and speaks with its many faces, "It's most likely heading back to the nearby human village." The only person in town who keeps things between Bill and the Pines peaceful managed to get away from the Oddtropolis police force. According to Bill, that's not bad for a human. All he has to do now is wait for a rescue party.

Bill keeping quiet and not making deals to be broken out with every passerby has the jail guards on edge. They all know Bill well, as he's quite the notorious criminal in this neck of the woods, so they all know that the lack of desperation is something more than an opportunity to have peace. It is a sign that he doesn't feel trapped.

Bill's hope turns out to be right. A couple of cat paws buck out and knock the guards out. Kelpinx walks in with a pair of saddlebags filled with oatmeal. It breaks open the cell.

"I am omnipresent, and the harbinger of peace. I sing siren's song and carry a branch from Greece." Kelpinx says. Bill gets up, as the riddle is ridiculously easy and is more of a "this is who it's from" message than anything. Bill hops on.

"Dove sent you," Bill says, "Now hurry up! Those guards won't stay knocked out forever!" Kelpinx starts to run.

"You're lucky to have a human who cares about you," Kelpinx says as it runs through town, "With all the atrocities you have caused and your attempt to head back home, it would be wise to leave you to rot."

"Can it, Braniac!" Bill fusses, "Knowing things is my job!"

"Yet if I not know," Kelpinx stops at the bank of the stream, "How can I follow my father's legacy of making riddles of everything? Hold your breath." Before Bill can process what's about to happen, Kelpinx dives into the water. The thrill of the absence of oxygen is unlike anything Bill has ever experienced. Things soon get weird for Bill.

Excitement is quickly replaced with a horrid sensation that Bill has never felt before. Panic sets in as he realizes that this body is not just a bag of flesh, but it's also mortal! Bill tries to surface, but Kelpinx makes sure that Bill doesn't get away.

Kelpinx finally surfaces and gets out of the stream in Gravity Falls. Bill falls off the beast and violently coughs out water. Fluid flows out of his nose with every exhale. Kelpinx dives back under the water, its task now accomplished.

"And what did you learn from your experience?" Melody asks. She's been perfecting a look for a new exhibit for Bill. Melody is one of the few people in the shack who doesn't despise him with every part of her being, but putting Bill to work is the best way to make sure the ex-demon gets shelter without having him deal with bedbugs for the rest of his days.

"(Y/N) has plot armor!" Bill proclaims.

"Nothing about mortality or...?" Melody hangs a tapestry showing Bill's wheel. Bill scowls at Melody.

"Crawling while coughing water out of your own lungs is not a fun time when you're trapped in a FLESH BAG!!!" Bill shouts.

"Close enough," Melody finally finishes up the exhibit, "Alright. Opening time's soon! Remember what I told you about looking approachable." Bill grumbles something about how this is quite unbecoming of himself as he goes stand on a pedestal.

Now, Bill is slimy and tries to be the one who benefits from deals more than the other, but he always holds up his end of the bargain. He's just typically the one who isn't forced to get on stage and perform party tricks for a bunch of "snotty kids." Melody leaves and I follow behind her.

"I want to see the oncoming humiliation," I say, "So I hope you don't mind me joining a tour."

"You'll benefit greatly from learning a little something about this town," Melody tells me, "We best hurry."

This tour is packed with education. Mythical creatures, both native and immigrant would tell us a few things about their kind ranging from lifespan to culture as the tour group is taken to each exhibit. Anything too dangerous to be in the shack have realistic sculptures and tidbits of information written down on a sign.

It's quite curious they didn't go the sculpture route with Bill. The town people cower at the sight of the man himself, and the tourists are picking up on the tension between this exhibit and the locals. Bill shuffles some tarot cards and they end up falling out of his hands. He has no choice but to kneel down and gather them. The townspeople laugh. Bill's face is red. I can't tell if he's embarrass, angered, or both. I approach the exhibit and bend down. I pick up some of the cards. I get up and hand what I gathered to Bill.

"Keep cool," I quietly tell Bill, making sure that the tourists can't hear what I have to say, "Act like that was part of your presentation."

"You're laughing now, but just wait until I get my power back!" Bill declares, "Then you'll know what true fear is like!"

"OoOoOoh! I'm sOoOoOo scaaared!" A teenager mocks.

"What was that, kid!?" Bill scowls and marches up to the teenager. I facepalm.

"Look out, Gravity Falls!" The teenager laughs, "Your future tyrant can't hold tarot cards!"

"You'll pay for that!" Bill starts to punch the teen. Melody and I both hurry to break up the situation, only for the two of us to get caught in the crossfires. Several limbs are broken and blood spills. Some parents have to take their kids out of the Shack and people are already on the phones either recording what's happening or calling the police. The rest of the Pines come in as they hear the teenager screaming from across the Shack.

"Now this! This is what the Mystery Shack needs more of!" Stanley says. Stanford's looking for his gun.

"We're totally dead, dudes!" Soos panics back to the gift shop to look for the teenager's father's money to give a refund (+ some more for compensation). Dipper and Mabel are the only ones willing to go to the center of the chaos and deal with it. Dipper grabs a taser from his pocket and uses it to shock Bill. Bill collapses on the ground, giving the teenager just enough time to get away in tears.

"Once you stand up," Dipper speaks in a calm and collected tone, "You'll have two seconds to run before I hunt you down." Bill looks at me as if I can stop Dipper from chasing Bill to his own doom. My mouth feels too thick for me to say anything.

"Dipper!" Mabel calls out, "Why are you even letting him get up? Just one blast from Grunkle Ford's gun and it's all over."

"I'm not giving Bill a head start for him," Dipper says. Bill starts to move around. He gets to his feet and doesn't hesitate to run. Dipper runs after grabbing the gun from Stanford.