Angels | Ghosts Of The Past 2 [BoyxBoy] ✓

46. the ANTONIO DESUSA

Chase.

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I'm sitting on the toilet lid the next morning, playing with the sleeves of my sweater as I wait for dad to come into the bathroom. He's going to check if I cut again. I don't know what to do. It's been a day since I picked at my cuts and I don't know if he'll notice or not. I fumble with my fingers.

A moment later dad comes in. 

I can't look at him. 

"So, I talked to Jenny. We made up again and I told her about how you've been doing and what we've been doing and she said I have to give you more freedom." 

I look into his eyes full of hope. 

"I'm not going to check your body, Chase. It was a desperate action on my part and I'm sorry. I can tell you've been much better and I just have to trust that if something happens you'll tell me." He smiles at me. 

I look down at my wrist and play with my bracelet. 

"What's wrong?" Dad asks, sounding worried again. 

"I don't deserve more freedom, dad." I say softly. 

I look into his eyes. He looks so hopeless like before. 

"I didn't cut." I say quickly. "I.. picked at some of my cuts at school." 

My father takes a deep breath. He leans against the sink. 

"I'm not mad at you. I just want to understand." He says, trying very hard to be calm. 

"Why did you feel the urge to do that?" 

"Well.. I was alone. My friends ditched me and I had to eat lunch by myself and I just felt like shit that day so.. I started scratching and I couldn't stop until Anthony came.." I look into dad's eyes. 

"It won't happen again, I swear!" 

"But if you do ever feel like doing that.. Please call me. You have to understand I'm here for you. I'll support you no matter what." 

I thought he would yell at me. I was sure he would. 

"Are you disappointed?" I mumble. 

He smiles at me. "I'm proud you told me yourself." He opens his arms. 

I get up and embrace him tightly. He kisses my cheek. "I'm proud of you."

× × ×

"Chase! Anthony is here!" Dad calls. 

Moments later the door to my room swings open and in comes that sparkly ball of glitter. 

Today's outfit:  A black T-shirt, a fuchsia sparkly blazer, matching pants without sparkle, white and black colored combat boots with a white and a black striped choker, a bunch of rings and his hair is slicked back like he's on a red carpet as per usual. 

"You're not even gonna try to give my eyes a break?" 

"Don't you understand? They'll never get a break. I could wear a trash bag and I'd still be me." He smiles. 

"You mean hideous?" 

"I meant sparkly." He snares. 

I laugh. 

He sits next to me at the desk. 

"Have you practiced those things I told you to?" 

"Yes, mom." I sigh. 

He rolls his eyes and quickly checks the answers. His sweet perfume enters my nose and I find myself observing him. It's only now that I notice he has an ear piercing. It's two piercings connected by a chain. Surprisingly, it looks good.