My Reoccurring Dreams Vol. I

#019

I sat down on the couch being terrified because of what had just happened. He came downstairs and looked at me. He didn't have the gun in his hand anymore so I didn't feel as scared but I was still fucking scared. He sat down next to me and grabbed a chunk of my hair. "Did you fuck him?" He asked in the calmest voice, "Hm? Did you fuck him, yes or no?" I quickly shook my head no.

"I think you lyin'..." he said gripping my hair a little harder, "I don't like when you lie to me." It made me mad because I actually was telling the truth. "Do you think I'm stupid or slow Christa?" He asked, "Cause I feel like you think I'm some dummy." I shook my head no again hoping he'd let it go. "I'm sorry.." I whimpered softly. He smirked at me as he got up. "You'll be able to tell me how sorry you is ALL NIGHT trust me." He said chuckling as he dragged me upstairs.

"I said I was sorry.." I mumbled when he sat me down on the bed. "Yeah Ion know if I forgive you.." he said drinking on something in a red cup. "Drinking isn't gonna help-" I said before getting cut off. "Oh will you shut the fuck up?" He snapped, "You see me drink all the time and NOW you gotta problem wit it?" I sat there afraid to speak again. Then he started laughing again. "What? Yo lil boyfriend don't drink or sum?" He asked. "I didn't say that-" I said before getting cut off a second time. "I didn't ask you to talk. As a matter of fact Ion NEED you to talk right now." He said getting in my face.

I understood he was upset but he was starting to get on my nerves. "How many times have I stooped this low?" He yelled, "Oh right, I fuckin' haven't." I was trying to listen to him since he was only mad because of me. But something about sitting there and letting him yell at me didn't sit right with my spirit. "Did you fuck him?" He asked in what he thought was a calm voice. "No." I said getting an attitude. "I'm not talking about now. Don't play fuckin' dumb." He yelled. "Stop fucking screaming at me." I said firmly before getting up, "I don't wanna have this conversation anymore."

"I don't give a fuck what you want right now." He said, "I tried that and you still don't act right so now what?" I rolled my eyes and looked at him like the fool I thought he was. "Yeah a dose of your own medicine don't taste good do it?" I laughed. "Ohhh so that's what this is about?" He chuckled looking me up and down. "You know it's plenty of other girls that want yo spot right?" He said raising his eyebrow. "Then how come you so bent outta shape about what I did just now hm?" I said walking towards him. He looked at me not having shit else to say. "All the girls that want my spot yet you still standing right here in front of me." I said mushing his forehead. He smacked my hand away and chuckled to hide his anger.

"If you wanna replace me then let me know cause finding another dick to sit on ain't hard-"I said before he grabbed my throat and kissed me. I pulled away from him, becoming startled. "What the fuck is yo problem?" I asked watching him sit on the bed as he chuckled at absolutely nothing. "Nothin' I just think it was funny that you thought you was leavin' me again." He said chuckling some more. "I leave all the time." I said folding my arms. "And that's ya fuckin' problem." He said looking pissed off, "You can find whatever dick you want but they not gon' lay it on you like I do." I froze up looking at him laugh at my expression.

"Come sit down." He demanded. "Fuck no. Not after the shit you just pulled." I said still being startled by him. "Fine you don't wanna come sit down then I'll make you." He said getting up. I backed away from him until I found myself in a corner. He picked me up and sat back down on the bed. He looked at my neck and noticed a love mark on it. A love mark that clearly didn't come from him cause he had been gone. It made him upset but he laughed at it anyways. "Christa.." he said calmly, "where this mark come from?" My heart sank and I couldn't talk. "Forget it. Ion wanna know no more." He kissed me again holding onto me tightly. I trembled in his arms as his moods switched. I was terrified.

"Why you shakin'? Hm?" He asked smirking at me, "I ain't done nothin' yet." My stomach filled with butterflies as I thought about how much he sounded like his old self. He wasn't so wishy washy back then. I missed that version of him. "I'm sorry.." I said to him. He looked at me with a dead look on his face for a little bit. "You not sorry... you will be though." He said lifting my shirt. He found even more love marks all over my chest. I looked away from him knowing he wasn't happy. "You just let that nigga do anything huh?" He teased, "And people think I'm the nasty one." I pulled my shirt back down and felt my face getting hot from embarrassment.