Wishes

This wasnt supposed to happen

I try for 10 minutes to get Ashley breathing properly again, but it's not working I end up having to do CPR to keep her alive. I asked Chris to call an ambulance and they get to hotel very quickly. The paramedics come in and I explain everything to them, I see Chris looking so confused because I used all the proper doctor talk.
They rush Ashley into the hospital and Chris is nice enough to drive me. When I get there I'm told to wait in the waiting area. Chris is with me and he keeps trying to get me to sit down but I can't. I pace back and forth, god what if she isn't okay. She can't die here. Not in a strange city she needs to be at home with her family. My mum will never forgive me.
The doctor finally comes out to see me "hello, your sister is stable, she is on a ventilator right now, to help her breath, just while her lungs calm down. They are inflamed right now, so we have taken some blood and we are going to run tests"
"You think it's spread to her lungs now don't you?"
"Lauren your a doctor right?"
"I am yes, so give it to me straight"
"I do believe the cancer has spread to her lungs, she is struggling"
I take a deep breath I knew this was coming.
"Okay, so I need to get back home as soon as possible"
"Lauren, she can't travel just yet, she isn't stable enough"
"Oh, we were supposed to be flying home tomorrow afternoon"
"I'm sorry but I can't sign off on that. You can go and see her whenever you like"
"Thank you"
I sit down next to Chris and he puts his hand on my back "we will figure this out Lauren"
"How Chris? I can't afford another night in a hotel. I'm going to loose my money on the tickets. My sister could die without my mum even being here. This is all my fault. I should have never bought her all this way"
"Hey, this isn't your fault. You didn't know this would happen."
I can feel the tears prick my eyes, I can't do this, I can't break not now.
"I have to go call my mother, can you go sit with her?"
"Of course"
I go off and call my mum
"Hello"
"Dotty?"
"Hey Lauren"
"Why are you answering my mums phone?"
"She had another episode last night, ended up at the local pharmacy demanding pills"
"Oh god!"
"It's okay I sorted it. When are you and Ashley coming home?"
"That's the thing, Ashley isn't doing well and we can't travel right now"
"Omg is she okay?"
"Hopefully she will be"
"Look you focus on your sister, I've got your mum"
"Thank you dot, I'd be lost without you"
"Always. Give ash a big kiss from me and look after yourself too okay"
"I will. Love you"
"Love you too honey"
Dotty was an old family friend, she has helped me through all of this. She was the mother I didn't currently have. She was amazing.
As I walked back to Ashley I couldn't believe what I saw, some of the cast of the film standing around her bed.
"OMG! What are you guys doing here?"
"Chris called us" Scarlett said while coming over to hug me
"You didn't have to come guys"
"Please she has worked her way into all of our hearts. We wouldn't be anywhere else" RDJ said. He engulfed me in a huge hug and I felt so much love from these strangers I'd just met. I couldn't believe they would come to be by her side.

We are all sat around waiting for Ashley to wake up, it's been hours and there has been no Change. I can feel myself breaking, my breathing is getting fast and I can feel the tears trying to escape. I excuse myself from the room and run outside. I needed some fresh air, I find a little alley way, I drop to the floor, no one can see me here. I break. Sobs rack my body, I can't breath, I can't form words, my little sister is dying and I can't do anything to save her.
During my mental break down I feel a hand on my shoulder, I look up and Chris is looking down at me, sadness in his eyes. He kneels down beside me and pulls me into a hug, I rest my head against his chest and he holds me while I cry. I haven't cried like this in 4 years, I always told myself if I was to break I would be no use to Ashley. But right now I'm scared. Once I have calmed down enough. I speak
"I'm going to lose her" it's barley a whisper but Chris hears me.
"Lauren, I don't know what to say"
I just nod and hold him tighter. He made me feel less alone, and right now these people were the only people I had.
"Come on, let's get you inside. Robert has a plan"
He pulls me up and keeps an arm around my waist. When I get to the room, Robert comes to me and hugs me.
"Right, I'm going to rent a house here, we are all going to stay in it and help you with Ashley. Until your able to fly again. You will then take my private plane and go home in style. Okay"
"Robert I can't do that. That's going to cost so much money. I don't have....."
"Forget about that. Look we have spent 2 days with that little girl and she is in our hearts, she is so bright and kind and caring. So we are going to get her better in comfort and then you guys are going to get home okay"
I cry some more and he holds me tighter "thank you. Thank you all so much"
Chris is still holding my hand, he squeezes it gently. I look over to him and mouth "thank you" he nods and winks at me.
I've never felt so much love in one room before.