Kaleidoscope

v

"Boris? What?" I caught my breath quickly, heart pounding with some feeling layered below. "What the- what?"

"Have been wanting to do that for so long, Potter." Boris was panting too. "Never noticed until that night."

"You? Holy shit. Fuck. Um-" I stumbled over several swears, whats and I love yous in my mind. "You like- You just kissed me?"

Boris laughed, "Very good observation, hm?"

"You're gay? I mean- me? Like you just kissed me and-"

"Not gay. Something... different." His lips pursed and his eyes focused on the light rocky ground of below the bleachers. "What I felt for Kotku was real. And you?"

His eyes settled on me again. "Real."

My face heated up, and a sensible sentence finally tumbled out of my mouth. "You like me? I never thought you did..."

I saw a small flicker of fear flash in Boris' eyes. "You do feel the same, yes?"

I nodded quickly. "Yes! God yes! I mean, yeah. I have."

"You're very good at confession, hm Potter?" Boris chuckled.

"Shut up, you ass. We were having a moment." I glared at him.

Boris just looked down and pouted at his fallen vodka. "Perfect."

"Not my fault it fell." I shrugged.

And in that moment, I realized the world seemed to slow down, bringing me back to earth once more, Boris at my side. The familiar kaleidoscope of butterflies paraded through my stomach in glee, though, they were more relaxed. They weren't anxious, or even overly giddy, they were genuinely happy. I smiled, watching as Boris met my gaze again. I threw my arms over his shoulders, embracing him. Something I need would've wanted to do.

But I was different now. We were different now. And maybe, I thought, my mother flickering into my mind.

Maybe difference was okay.