He leans down and kisses me this time, our lips intertwine, they feel so perfect together.
He pulls away again.
"I fucking love you Jimmy."
"You just said you hated me."
"I lied," I wrap my arms around his skinny torso and rest my head on his chest.
He runs his hand down my back and lets out a heavy sigh.
I look up at him, tears welling up in my eyes.
"I just," he sighs again and pulls his arms away, pushing me off of him, "I can't."
I shake my head and look at the floor, "It's not fair."
He's silent.
"I'll talk to you later Jimmy," I spin around and open the bathroom door, exiting the room.
I go and find Mike.
"Hey, do you think I could crash here tonight?"
He nods, "yeah of course, I can set you up in the camper if you'd like."
"Thank you."
He motions for me to follow him and he takes me up to his room.
He unlocks the door and hands me my bag.
"Lets go get you settled in then, hey?"
"Yeah, thanks again."
"No worries!"
Once we get in the trailer i immediately curl up on the bed. The camper has a kind of old ans musty smell and the curtains are parshly falling down on one window.
"Sorry, she's kinda run down, but I keep the bedding clean in case anyone needs a place to stay," he lights a scented candle and sits on the edge of the bed.
"Are you doing okay y/n?"
I shrug, "I left home, and shit isn't going good with Jimmy."
"I'm sorry," he rests a gentle hand on my leg.
"It's cool, I'll live."
"You can stay in here as long as you need, you could even clean it up a bit and make her your own."
He smiles.
"Really?"
He nods, "yeah of course!"
I sit up and hug him.
"I appreciate you with my whole heart Mike."
"It's not a big deal, really! But I appreciate you too," he gives me a tight squeeze before pulling away, "I'm gonna get back to the party, if you want to come back in feel free to, heres the keys," he drops them on the counter, "I would lock it up if you leave."
I nod.
I pull the blankets he gave to me over my head and take a long inhale in.
The blankets smell of weed and oak wood.
I shut my eyes and soon end up falling asleep.
A while later I'm woken up by a loud banging on the door.
Startled, I almost roll off the bed, I push myself up and open the door.
"Hey, I havent seen you in a couple hours, I wanted to make sure you were ok," Jimmy looks up at me from the ground. He holds a bottle of vodka in one hand and puffs his cigarette with the other.
"I thought you hated me."
He ignores that sentence, "Mike told me you're staying in here for a while?"
"Yeah, why?" I cross my arms and move to the side, silently inviting him in.
He pushes past me even though I left a ton of room for him to get by.
"Why'd you leave home?"
He sets the vodka on the counter.
"Not that it's your buisness, but my mom's an alcoholic and found out I was doing coke and lost her shit."
He's silent.
"My mom's an alcoholic too," he says after a couple seconds.
"Congrats."
He furrows his eyebrows at me.
"Why are you here Jimmy?" I sigh and grab the bottle of vodka, take a few swigs before sitting down on my bed.
"Because I can't stay away from you."
"But you can't stand being around me."
"I can't stand seeing you make out with other guys!"
He raises his voice and slams his fist on the counter.
I flinch, "but you don't want me," I pull my arms around myself.
"When did I say that?"
I look at the floor and say nothing.
He grabs my chin and tilts my head so I'm looking up at him.
"Hey, when did I?" He soften his tone.
"Earlier," the tears I didn't even realize were collecting roll down my hot cheeks.
"I said 'I can't'."
"Why not?"
He releases a frustrated sigh, "Look, I don't know!"
"Okay, fine. Just stop acting like you own me when you clearly dont want to commit." I wipe my tears and flop back onto the bed.
He comes and lays beside me and gazes into my eyes.
"I love you too, y/n.." he runs a gentle hand through my messy hair.
More tears roll down my face.
"How many more times are you going to make me cry, Jimmy?"
He pulls his hand away from my face,
"I'm sorry..."
"Me too,"
He buries his head into the crook of my neck.
His tears roll onto my shirt, soaking into the soft fabric.
I caress his cheek and tilt his head up to look at me.
"Stay the night, Jimmy, please."
He nods and kisses my neck innocently.
"Yeah," he lets out a soft sigh, "Yeah, sure."
I pull him into me and wrap my leg around his.
He falls asleep in my arms, I kiss his head lightly and close my eyes, letting the moment carry me into a pleasant sleep.
